Emy Minzel

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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

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Failing forward ~

May 2, 2019April 30, 2019 emyminzel

To me, life isn’t only about getting things, achieving goals, or gathering gold. It is about enjoying the experiences you just get once. Nobody escapes a life without scars, growing pains, or obstacles. Whether they are internal or visible for the world to see, we all have trauma we have endured. I think the way we live our lives reflects how we go about healing ourselves.

I’ve been contemplating some of my recent ‘failures’ and how they have changed how I think. There are times I think to myself “Why am I trying so hard? What drives me to pursue writing and politics beyond the wonderfully peaceful life I live? What makes me still so consistently persistent about these goals?”

I even wonder “How many times do I continue to ‘fail’ before I admit that maybe I won’t succeed in the way I envision?” Of course, I know I must not quit. Not right before I make the progress I wish to see! I keep going with intentional tenacity and I think I know why.

I keep moving towards these things because I am simply following my heart. The decision to living simply, love lots, and bloom, where I am planted, is something I aim to do. Writing feels like art and I enjoy sharing my thoughts and experiences with the world in hopes of helping others. Being involved in local politics is a natural pull, stemming organically from my love and concern for the environment.

Running as a political candidate was a lot of fun, and I refer to it as a life experience. However, there are real statistics that say if I run again, most likely, I will not win. So, what would make me want to try again? It just does not feel right to sit it out and not try one more time. I care deeply about my community and Minnesota. I think to show up and try my best, anyway, is how I can direct my dedication and passion for protecting the environment.

Writing feels like magic to me. Stacy and I have worked hard to build a community of like-minded Adventurers, who enjoy reading bits of wisdom we love to share. Participating in a heart centered and inspired project keeps me looking forward to the next adventure with my best friend! Being an Adventure Sister is a creative outlet that feels good for my soul and has changed me for the better!

These things that I “fail” at are what make me feel alive! They haven’t made me rich, and as a matter of fact, they challenge me to level up even when I don’t want too! It seems that following my calling and heart, has given me confidence and courage. I feel blessed to be able to do these things that pull my soul, even though from the outside looking in, they may look unsuccessful.

After contemplation of my failures, I see life isn’t always about chasing gold even though somedays it feels like it. Sometimes it feels more purposeful and rewarding to pursue the callings of your soul. I know I will be A-Okay if I never get to Congress or get on the New York Bestseller list. I will still make a difference in a way that feels good to me.

I believe the journey of existence is about gaining perspective of the purpose of life. You cannot appreciate the good if you do not experience strife occasionally. If we always get what we want, when we want it, we probably won’t value what we already have

What is more important is enjoying the everyday experience of life in a way that feels authentic to me. By listening to my heart and letting it guide me I have learned not to be frightened of failure, it’s just a word. Growing pains and setbacks are just part of this fabulous obstacle course of life I get to live! If I chose to detach from desired outcomes, I get to find pleasure in what really matters; enjoying the journey of failing forward!

How do you overcome failures? What keeps you passionate about your calling? I’d love to hear from you!

Love and blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

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Are you, perfectly Imperfect too?

April 30, 2019 emyminzel

I write a great deal about life lessons, self-improvement, personal and spiritual growth. Lately though, it has occurred to me that I am always trying to change something about myself. I’m forever quitting sugar, alcohol, meat, dairy, coffee or other habits; depending on my motives. I am currently working through a dedicated 40 straight days of kundalini exercise, that looks down upon taking a day off for life. If I miss a day, I have to restart the count!

All these self-improvement desires and rules I set for myself tend to lead to a lot of ”shoulding” myself. Every day I say: “I should do this or should do that… Don’t do this or don’t do that.” When I eat sugar or have a glass of wine; should I feel bad about it? When I don’t have time or I just plain don’t feel like doing yoga, well, that leads to me feeling like I am letting myself down. Not a great feeling!

This cycle of setting my standards high (and sometimes impractical) has started to make me think. “When is it okay to just love myself exactly as I am?” Yes, I do these things to be healthier and happier, but when I let myself down, I feel bad about it and this does not make me feel happy at all! It has the opposite effect, and this makes me want to eat my feelings and a lot of cake.

This cycle of high expectations turns into failing perfectionism, not self-improvement. It turns into a twisted way to psychologically torture myself into feeling weak for failing at all these self-imposed rules. Gahhhhhhh!

Guess what?! Turns out that I am very much imperfect. How about you?

This got me thinking. When is it okay to accept and love myself just as I am? Imperfectly perfect. So what if I carry a few extra pounds? I still love my curves (my husband does too), my personality, and my smile. I am healthy enough to walk my dog, kayak, camp, and adventure without pain. Is my weight and sugar habit really as big of a problem as I seem to think it is?

What do my subconscious and body feel, when I cannot let myself love me just as I am? This cannot be healthy either, can it? I know that humans have layers of consciousness and deep down we know if we love ourselves or not. Yes, I know that taking care of your body, mind, and spirit is self-love. However, I also am beginning to see that having unrealistic expectations can have the opposite effect.

What if I tried something super drastic like loving myself enough to allow for the imperfections and what makes me, me?! I know that I love others who are not perfect, and I do not expect anybody to be picture-perfect! To me this proves it is very much possible to love someone just as they are. So can I love myself just as I am also? I have decided to give it a shot.

After trying to change some of the habits in my life and failing at some of them, I just started to wonder. “Maybe this is just who I am?” Is it really so awful if I have cake and coffee for breakfast once in a while?! I mean, come on man! That is the best part of being an adult! If I don’t eat cake every day, which of course, I do not. Then what is the problem?

I believe the point of life is to enjoy the way we choose to live it! Why do I ‘should myself’ or feel as if I am letting myself down for enjoying some sweetness in life?! Does a number on the scale and the fact I did not meditate today, change who I am inside? NO! It does not. Does anybody else care that I did not measure up to my own lofty standards? I doubt it.

Today I am choosing to love myself as I am! I am just me; Perfectly imperfect.

Sending you love and blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

#lifelessons, #teamwork, Innerwork

Mirror Mirror on the wall…

April 26, 2019March 6, 2025 emyminzel

Who’s the most stubborn of them all?

Have you heard of the psychological concept called mirroring? It is something people do subconsciously when communicating with each other. Sometimes it helps people seem charming, sociable and friendly. Other times, when we see something in others that we do ourselves but aren’t aware of, it can rub us the wrong way. It will change the way you perceive someone on a subliminal level, both in a good and bad way.

Sometimes we will mimic body languages like smiling, crossing our legs or arms while having a conversation. This involuntary movement helps us connect on a personal level beyond our words. I have heard, that when you notice or perceive an undesirable characteristic in others, it is because you possess the same trait yourself. If you do not like this quality about yourself, you are not going to like it in another person.

Most of the time we do not even know we are mirroring others, or see ourselves in another, although it is a very human attribute. Stacy and I recently had the experience of mirroring each other with our strong wills. I know who she is. I love it that she is strong-willed, determined, driven, and will tell me how she feels even if it is hard. I find it a giant blessing to have a good friend who wears her crown as proudly as I like too! I love these qualities, and we mirror each other in this way.

We have a lot of things in common and robust will power is just one of them. But as you may have guessed, if we turn our willfulness and face each other instead of the world… Well… “Mirror, Mirror, on the wall. Who’s the most stubborn of them all?” Our Boss Queen Crowns get lock horned into a stronghold, and there we are. Crowns crossed and face to face; mirroring our sister.

Well, what do you do then? Since Stacy is a dear friend of mine, I decided its best to take some time and stepped back to contemplate how I was going to handle this delicate matter. I do not want to hurt her but… “I’m right, and she’s wrong.” I know this isn’t true and can guarantee Stacy was thinking the same thing about me! Truth is somewhere in the middle; now it was up to us to find common ground.

Had we not realized we were indeed mirroring each other’s attributes or that we put our friendship before our stubbornness, we would probably still be crown locked. I could easily see how this type of mirroring could be damaging to a relationship or even an everyday encounter if not recognized. I think this type of thing happens a great deal in the real world, and how we chose to handle the situation is vital to the outcome.

I think it’s easy to write off a stranger, co-worker or acquaintance for the rest of your life if you feel strongly that you are in the right. Family and close friends are a different story though, you tend to let love override righteousness in favor of peace in most mirroring situations. This happens in mother/daughter or father/son relationships a lot. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree is another way we say it to compare similarities.

Resemblances do not stop us from disagreeing in those moments of discord. What I love about my soul sister and myself is now the same thing that is causing chaos. Mirroring can be very helpful if you are willing to see yourself as others see you. You get the chance to see how it feels to have your behavior inflicted upon yourself and see how you like it.

It can be uncomfortable because growth is often painful. I mean. How, dare she use MY attributes against me?! (Insert sarcasm here.) Seeing myself in my best friends’ actions was awkward. Yet because it was my friend, my response softened, and I did my best to reign in the Boss Queen inside, that likes to call the shots.

I bring up this mystical communication we call mirroring because it’s not talked about much, yet it is used in everyday interactions between all humans. Our exchanges with others very much depends on what kind of energy you are bringing to the situation before you. At work, school, relationships, social media, driving, or at the dinner table. What you put out is what we get back. Attitudes are contagious, so hopefully, we are all doing our best to share sunshine and not BS.

When we see something in another we do not like, maybe it is a sign to go within and fix it in ourselves. Even if we don’t know how to correct our behavior, even noticing our tendencies, is a great way to get to know yourself. I will use this knowledge to temper how I may react in the next similar situation. I think that is how we mature and become the people we want to be. I love using my experiences to grow. I chose to make small changes in myself and do better next time.

If ever I find myself crown locked with another Boss Queen, whether she’s my friend or not. I will stop and see myself in her. I will do my best to practice empathy and really listen to her message. Sometimes, friends and family fight. It is life. But I’ve found it is my willingness to be respectful and negotiate that really allows me to move through to a resolution, that is kind and acceptable for everyone.

This week the mirror showed me a reflection of the Boss Queen inside, getting crown-locked with my soul sister. “Mirror, Mirror, on the wall. Who’s the most stubborn of us all?”

I decided I valued my friendship more than my righteousness. Now I take this lesson and self-awareness into the future with me. I have learned to appreciate the human who mirrors you. It’s a message to help you see yourself. They may be a reflection of you.

Love and blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

*Photo credit – Pure Heart Memoir

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

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This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine!

April 20, 2019April 19, 2019 emyminzel

Do you know that song? I learned it in Sunday School when I was a very young girl. For some reason, this song has always popped into my head on days when life seems a little harder than normal. I think it’s interesting that this song comes to me mostly on my down days. Those are the days I feel like ‘shining’ the least! I trust the Higher Power knows this and that is why it comes to mind in these moments.

There are months that I won’t even remember this joyful little song exist. Then there are times in which I sing it out loud and to myself, for the whole week. When I do, it feels like a simple sweet soothing lullaby for my spirit. I don’t believe in coincidences. I believe that when things happen in a pattern or synchronistic way, that this is a message from the Universe, just for you.

It’s taken me until my forties before I realized how significant this song has been for me. I often pray to the heavens when uncertain about life and ask “Just let me be the light.” I’ve found being the light in the world is not all that hard, and doesn’t have to look large or be a grand gesture. I simply do my best to be kind to everyone I come across; this is how I shine.

I think the best form of light comes from just listening. Like when someone is trying to tell a story, but the rest of the room is talking over them. That’s when I choose to make eye contact and nod in an affirmation that “I hear you and I see you.” Being heard is a powerful confirmation that shows people. “Hey, you matter! I care about how you feel and what you have to say.”

I am beginning to think this short, sweet, song (I learned so long ago) is a divine message sent to remind me, even on my hardest days, God/The Universe still sees me and is listening. I know the Universe responds to my energy and my vibrations and this song is sent to remind me to shine; by being kind and treat others as I want to be treated. I believe this song reminds me to listen closely to those around me.

There is a sign on my wall that says. “Attitudes are contagious, is your’s worth sharing?” I believe this to be true. Lifting others around you will help raise your own spirits as well, that’s just the way it works! This week has been a little rough for me and wouldn’t you know it, this song came to mind just tonight. Spirit is reminding me to be the best me I can be!

As you go about your week, I encourage you to do your best and let your light shine for yourself and others too. Even if you do not feel like shining brightly, remember, even the humble act of listening can be a wonderful way to spark the light in the eyes of your family, friends or community.

Remember, sometimes all it takes is to sincerely show up and say. “I hear you. You matter.”

Go light up the world in the way only you can do! Shine your uniqueness as you go through the adventure of life. Shine so bright that your light changes the world as only you can! I’d love to see how you shine! I believe in you! Let’s do this.

This little light of mine. I’m going to let it shine.

Yes, let it shine! Let it shine! Let it shine!

Love, light and blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister