Are you, perfectly Imperfect too?

I write a great deal about life lessons, self-improvement, personal and spiritual growth. Lately though, it has occurred to me that I am always trying to change something about myself. I’m forever quitting sugar, alcohol, meat, dairy, coffee or other habits; depending on my motives. I am currently working through a dedicated 40 straight days of kundalini exercise, that looks down upon taking a day off for life. If I miss a day, I have to restart the count!

All these self-improvement desires and rules I set for myself tend to lead to a lot of ”shoulding” myself. Every day I say: “I should do this or should do that… Don’t do this or don’t do that.” When I eat sugar or have a glass of wine; should I feel bad about it? When I don’t have time or I just plain don’t feel like doing yoga, well, that leads to me feeling like I am letting myself down. Not a great feeling!

This cycle of setting my standards high (and sometimes impractical) has started to make me think. “When is it okay to just love myself exactly as I am?” Yes, I do these things to be healthier and happier, but when I let myself down, I feel bad about it and this does not make me feel happy at all! It has the opposite effect, and this makes me want to eat my feelings and a lot of cake.

This cycle of high expectations turns into failing perfectionism, not self-improvement. It turns into a twisted way to psychologically torture myself into feeling weak for failing at all these self-imposed rules. Gahhhhhhh!

Guess what?! Turns out that I am very much imperfect. How about you?

This got me thinking. When is it okay to accept and love myself just as I am? Imperfectly perfect. So what if I carry a few extra pounds? I still love my curves (my husband does too), my personality, and my smile. I am healthy enough to walk my dog, kayak, camp, and adventure without pain. Is my weight and sugar habit really as big of a problem as I seem to think it is?

What do my subconscious and body feel, when I cannot let myself love me just as I am? This cannot be healthy either, can it? I know that humans have layers of consciousness and deep down we know if we love ourselves or not. Yes, I know that taking care of your body, mind, and spirit is self-love. However, I also am beginning to see that having unrealistic expectations can have the opposite effect.

What if I tried something super drastic like loving myself enough to allow for the imperfections and what makes me, me?! I know that I love others who are not perfect, and I do not expect anybody to be picture-perfect! To me this proves it is very much possible to love someone just as they are. So can I love myself just as I am also? I have decided to give it a shot.

After trying to change some of the habits in my life and failing at some of them, I just started to wonder. “Maybe this is just who I am?” Is it really so awful if I have cake and coffee for breakfast once in a while?! I mean, come on man! That is the best part of being an adult! If I don’t eat cake every day, which of course, I do not. Then what is the problem?

I believe the point of life is to enjoy the way we choose to live it! Why do I ‘should myself’ or feel as if I am letting myself down for enjoying some sweetness in life?! Does a number on the scale and the fact I did not meditate today, change who I am inside? NO! It does not. Does anybody else care that I did not measure up to my own lofty standards? I doubt it.

Today I am choosing to love myself as I am! I am just me; Perfectly imperfect.

Sending you love and blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

www.AdventurewithEmyandStacy.com

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

 

The work is the prayer

“I pray every single moment of my life; not on my knees but with my work.”  Susan B. Anthony

This quote always makes my heart smile and my soul sing. One of my favorite things about my grandmother was that even though she was a good Catholic woman, she did not preach her faith to others, she lived it. She just lived her life as an excellent nurse, wife, mother, grandmother and wonderful caring friend whose life seemed to be her living prayer. She had a wonderful effect on her small town of 600 people over the 60+ years she lived there. She was even out delivering meals on wheels the day she passed away.

 

I admire others who change the world by just being themselves by following their hearts and offering compassion. I believe that even small acts of kindness can make a huge difference to everyone. The person who gives and the one who receives the kindness; are both blessed by the feeling of caring. In a world so big, we must not forget it is the little everyday actions that make up our lives and legacy. My goal is to live my faith; by exhibiting compassion, kindness, and inspiration so others will feel free to share their light as well.

If we all take a moment to share the light inside ourselves with others, it tends to have a chain reaction. It’s as if we take turns relighting the spirit we all hold inside. This is important because there are times in our lives that some candles burn brighter than others and we all need a little motivation (or fuel) to get your pilot lights glowing again.

My friend Stacy and I take turns firing each other up all the time! We hold space and love for each other on our hardest days because we know that life has its ups and downs. During the downs, we do our best to uplift and inspire each other with ideas and suggestions on how to pull ourselves out of these lower vibes.

This doesn’t have to be miraculous or extravagant action, simple things tend to work best. Stacy often will suggest a book, or a Kundalini Yoga set that helps me in just the way I need. We take turns fueling the creative light in each other and then go out and share it. We do this by sharing ourselves with the world through our stories of growth; writing of our life-lessons, the gatherings we hold, coming soon retreats and even in our careers!

I shortened the original quote “The work is the prayer” to inspire myself to keep moving forward with our goals. Our ‘work’ as the Adventure Sisters does not really feel like work at all! I can truthfully say that it feels more like a living prayer. It is what I have to offer the world. The higher power did not give us these skills or desires for without reason. We have them because they are our gifts to the world.

Stacy and I are very different in many ways, yet so perfectly in sync that we complement each other’s strengths and even benefit each other’s weak spots. It is no accident that we came together in this lifetime; we have work to do and we know it. This inner knowing, listening to our guidance and desires to help other women grow and become their best selves, is our way of sharing our light. We believe lighting up even just one person can indeed change the world for the better.

We know this is true because we’ve practiced with each other, our families and our communities with positive results! Sometimes this doesn’t always look like light or sunshine on a beautiful day. Somedays it’s quietly listening and caring through tough times. Such is life though, it is not all sunshine, glitter and rainbows.

We know in those moments of darkness or difficulties, that we tend to grow the most and in the most valuable ways. These times are just as precious as the good days. So, as you go about life, remember that every action can indeed be a light in the world. Even little things like smiling at a stranger in your way at the grocery store, instead of an exhausted sigh and eye roll as an example.

We all have the power to change our world by changing ourselves, our attitude and this also changes our lives. When I am much older and look back at my life, I would love to say I spent my days living my prayer. By following my inner guidance to make the world around me a little kinder and brighter, because of my efforts to spark the light of others.

The work is the prayer!

I’d love to hear what inspires you?! Please feel free to share!

Wishing you love and blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

Promises, promises…

Have you ever started a diet or exercise routine, vowing to buckle down and get in shape? Then, only a week or two later, you’ve had enough and just throw in the towel altogether. I am willing to bet most people have done such a thing once or twice in their lifetime. Why is it that some of us just have the willpower to make these changes stick and others don’t?! Sure, some of it has to do with habits, addictions, laziness and genetics, but what I believe it all boils down to is… self-love.

Recently I started another 40-day Kundalini Kriya practice. I got to day 4 and decided I really didn’t want to do it today. Then came day 5 and 6, with no effort to begin again and this got me thinking. “Why is it so easy to break promises to myself? Why is okay to let myself down when I would not do that to someone else?” It was as if I heard my angels talking to me; because after asking these questions the answer seemed so simple yet jarring. I heard. “Love yourself.”

It doesn’t even have to be health related. It can be that you are sick of your job. Everyday you come home burnt out, frustrated and angrily telling yourself. “I need a new job!”  You truly want to look for another one but are just not able to get yourself to make the move you desire. So, you keep suffering, because the devil you know is better than the unknown right?

Again, I think this self-sabotaging behavior is just about the lack of self-love. Because you don’t know how to love yourself, or care deeply about your own wellbeing and all that entails, you can’t foster your own happiness. Like they say, the struggle is real. Maybe it’s based on the way I was raised. The biggest role models in my life have always been care-takers who have followed this same pattern.

My grandmother and mother worked very hard daily, taking care of others, with little time for themselves. Always putting other’s needs before their own. It was what they were taught to do and expected of them. Now that I am older and willing to look within, I see myself doing the very same thing. I believe this lack of knowledge, or examples on how to love myself fully, is what subconciously lays beneath the surface of my failures.

It’s time to break this cycle and keep promises made to myself. Some of us are better at self-care than others. When I say self-love, I mean all that encompasses caring for yourself; mind, body and spirit. Even financial wellness habits are included in what’s for, or not for our greatest and highest good. It is a lot to deal with everyday when you look at it all entails while still tending to lifes demands.

Yet, it all comes down to Self-love. Period. I feel this self-awareness is coming to me for a reason. When it feels as if life is consistently kicking me in the face, it’s because I’m just not listening to the whispers of wisdom, I know I hold deep down inside. It is divine guidance demanding me to ‘level-up’ for my own good. Yesterday I restarted a 40-day practice of Nabhi Kriya, along with other dietary and behavior changes as a promise to me.

I promise to prove my love to myself as consistantly as I try to prove my love for others. I promise to love myself enough to say no to what insults my inner wisdom. I promise to grab my self-care habits by the lapel and remind them I am not F’ng around with this gift of life I’ve been blessed with. I am worthy of my own love and care. I know I’m good at it!

It’s up to me and only me to keep these promises to myself. I hold the power, the passion and the determination to keep these promises. I must not rely on others for my own accountability or understanding. Even though it is nice to feel supported; when it comes down to it… it’s still all up to me. Every promise to change can only come from within and the resolve to love myself fully for my greatest good.

I promise to remind myself of all of this, when I want to quit.

To everyone struggling to practice self-love, break habits and make hard changes, I see you. I love you. You are not alone. We got this.

Wishing you love and blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

What a wonderful world!

Have you ever fell in love at first sight? I have, and believe it or not, it’s almost a daily occurrence for me. At the grocery store I’ll see an adorable little toddler asking five hundred questions to her patient parent, who’s answering the best they can. It happens when I see an elderly married couple, happily shopping together, knowing exactly what the other needs. Chatting away and oblivious to the rest of the customers around. How about when you see a new born baby or small puppy? Oh man, I fall head over heels in love with the adorable new additions to the world!

When I see people being their best selves, smiling, sharing love and kindness; it makes my heart swell and sometime tears of joy, from observing love in action. In those small blessed moments, I feel love just by witnessing it.

Does falling in love mean you stay in love forever or does it mean you had the opportunity to feel the emotion of love for a split second? I think it’s the later.

With all the news pointing out the bad in people, I am doing my best to seek out the best. I am choosing to fall in love with the world around me. I am working to see the good we have to offer before I focus on the bad of humanity. I do this for a reason. I believe that nurturing and encouraging the good will cultivate more goodness. Sure, there are people we run into having a bad day, but it’s up to you to choose if you let them share their negative energy with you or you share your positive energy with them.

Some may think of my optimistic tendencies as unrealistic, but I don’t. Yes, I do see the darkness out there as well. I am doing my best to choose to just not to focus on it though. I think this a feminine quality that many women hold intrinsically in our beings. To be able to take $hit in our environment and turn it into usable fertilizer that grows gardens of love and wisdom. I feel we see this as we witness the divine embodiment of feminine energy expressed as Mother Earth; caring for billions of living creatures. Mother Earth knows how to turn our waste into nourishment that fortifies all living beings.

It is nothing short of magic really. I think that is an inherent characteristic of the feminine; to be able to selflessly nurture who and what we choose if we so choose to. To me, holding love for the strangers at the grocery store or curbing harsh judgment to someone who may not fit my definition of civilized, has helped me to grow as well. Every living being deserves to be treated with kindness or respect.

As the Dalai Lama says. “If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.”

I believe that even a smile from a stranger passing by, may help to lift the spirits of others. I know that looking for the good in the world around me in my everyday life, helps me to feel good too. What you focus on grows. I am choosing to focus on the love in the world. I am choosing to see the love that flows all around me. I believe you will find love is everywhere if you look for it too.

I enjoy looking for reasons and ways to fall in love with humanity, even opportunities to experience love at first sight. If more of us would choose to do so; might this give us the will and ways to be the change, we wish to see in the world?  I know it can’t hurt. When you think to yourself, “What a wonderful world!” our actions will support your experiences of a wonderful world!

Wishing you beautiful experiences of lots of love around you. May you be a witness to love at first sight today and every day!

With love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com