I have learned what is important in life to me, after learning some lessons the hard way. Losing friendships and failed relationships have taught me a lot about what is important as I travel through life. I have taken for granted, very important people in my life, only to regret it after it was too late to do anything. Losing my grandparents within a month of each other was a giant slap to my ego. I learned some major life lesson’s the hard way, for a few years after that.
The saying “You don’t know what you got until it’s gone.” Had significant meaning to me after these tragic events. I did not get to tell my grandmother, to her face, how much I truly looked up to her and that I believed she was a real-life hero. I did not get to thank her for her the love and kindness that helped shape who I had become. As a writer, I am much more comfortable writing out my feelings then expressing them with my voice. Yet, these experiences have taught me I must use ‘my voice’ when it is important for me to do so.
It is important, that I let the people I love, know just how much I love them and why. Many people in the world are sensitive, self-conscious and really do wonder if they are truly loved. I spent time, running circles in my own head, when I was younger wondering what made me worthy of love? Did just being born mean that I was entitled to love? I had a long and difficult journey, in my youth, learning just how to love myself. Learning how to give myself the respect and significance, I often gave freely to others, yet didn’t feel worthy of myself. In time, I found what I was looking for. Me. I was there all along.
I am grateful I have learned to love my perfectly imperfect self. That was because I also learned how to love others unconditionally first. I learned that nobody is perfect, and I should not expect myself to be either. I learned that I love other people’s imperfects just as much as I love the things they are really great at. My daughter is sometimes too shy to come out of her shell. When I see her acting this way I think; “I wish she knew just how wonderful she truly is. She is so smart, kind, witty, generous and has a heart of gold. I wish she could see herself as I see her.” I often wonder what others see when they see me. Do you?
I have learned what matters and is important to me; is that I let others know the wonderful qualities I see they possess. I have learned to appreciate my own mother, so much more, after the death of my grandparents. I am an only child, like my daughter. I learned what it felt like to have your one and only child move out and grow up. Never once, when I was younger and moving out on my own, did I even think of my mom’s feelings about the situation. I was so excited to be moving on with my life that I didn’t even realize she was also beginning a new journey herself.
Learning to appreciate the experiences of my elders, like my mother, is also important to me. I would much rather learn some lessons through the experiences of others, especially if they are difficult ones. Learning that with age comes wisdom, was a turning point for me. I started to reach out to others more experienced then I. Life experiences are meant to be shared; sometimes they help you and other times you can use your experiences to help others.
Another value that is important to me is connection. To feel heard, to be appreciated for who I truly am. I have learned to always try my hardest to be ‘authentically me.’ I have learned that when I’m not me, when I try to fit in and follow the heard, life gets more difficult. It became of utmost importance to me, to listen to my heart and the callings of my soul. It was difficult at times, but I never felt more purposeful in my life then when I started to truly be me. Quirky humor, type ‘A’ personality, Nature loving hippie chick, who really wanted to let my light shine.
I wanted that light to shine in a way that helped others the same way I had learned from the strong women in my life. I wanted to pay it forward and decided that if I wanted to change the world, I had better work on myself first. So, I did. I started looking within for the answers instead of searching for external direction. I figured out that nobody knew what I needed, to feel fulfilled, but me. I just had to ask myself the hard questions and hold myself accountable for the changes I wished to see.
It became important to me to practice kindness. To share my love for life, the planet and for others in a way that felt good and healthy. I started by gardening organic produce. Working to learn about and implementing Permaculture practices around my home. I wanted to nurture the Earth as she nurtured me. I learned to respect my mother’s opinion instead of rolling my eyes like a teenager. I learned that my young daughter had more wisdom then she led on. I learned I was also full of wisdom I could chose to use as well.
I learned that my husband’s commitment to me was the foundation I depend on to be brave enough to shine my light in the political arena. Without him offering a safe place to fall, I would have not felt comfortable enough to put myself ‘out there.’ I have learned to not take this very special relationship for granted. I have learned to be better at keeping up relationships by taking responsibility for contacting my friends and family instead of waiting for the phone to ring. I do this because my relationships are important to me.
People are important to me; my family, friends, community and the strangers (friends) I do not know yet revolving on this planet around me. We are all connected on this big old Globe. I see that we have so much more in common then we could ever have in differences. I work to shine my light to promote peace, community and working together.
This is me. I have learned that it is okay to be as me, as I can be, while loving others for who they truly are as well. Warts and all. I truly believe most people are good in their souls, they just have to choose to foster the good and utilize it. I do my best to do the same. It is connection that is most important to me, not money or power. It is the divine spark of life within that connects us all that I like to promote in myself and others. This is what I find most important.
Empowering others to be as authentic as possible to themselves is what powers me to be and do better every day. The good in me, sees the good in you!
What is most important to you?
Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,
Emy Minzel ~
@EmyforHouse15A
Emy Minzel 