Tag: #bekind

Will you hold my hand?

emyminzel

Earlier this week, I had a minor surgery to remove a cyst in my neck. The procedure was performed in an operating room. As they wheeled me in, I saw a room full of stainless-steel equipment and nurses bundled up in their surgical garb and masks and remembered I was going to be fully awake for this procedure. The area numbed with Novocain before the doctor was to remove the growth with a scalpel.

Being awake, I made small talk with the nurses, who were very kind and chatted with me too. There was one nurse whose job it was to sit and keep me company, while monitoring my vital signs. I did not think I was nervous since I knew what was going to happen and how it was going to happen. Yet the moment they helped me on to the operating table I seem to have gotten cold feet. I wanted to run away!

When she strapped on the blood pressure cuff, my cover of small talk and cracking jokes was blown! My heartrate and blood pressure were through the roof! Even though I tried to play it cool, statistics showed my body was clearly in fight or flight mode. The nurse, in charge of my vitals, was a welcome distraction from the reality of a large incision being made to my body while awake.

When the doctor walked in, I chatted with her too. She’s become my favorite doctor and I feel very comfortable with her. In my head, I was trying to calm myself, by inducing my own meditative state of breathing deep and such. No luck, my body knew what was going to happen and even though my mind was very logical and factual, my blood pressure was not coming down.

It’s like my body knew trauma was coming and it was very scared. At that moment I knew I needed comfort. I looked at the nurse, who was right next to me the whole time, and asked her. “Will you please hold my hand?”

She obliged kindly and continued to hold my hand for the whole procedure. Doing her best to ask me questions and give me distractions from the doctor and scalpel working diligently behind me. Nurse W told me she was a seasoned nurse, working part-time until retirement. I could tell. She had calmness and caring demeanor only years of practice can produce. It made me feel like I could ask her to help me in the only way she could, by holding my hand.

Isn’t it funny how you can find comfort in a perfect stranger’s hand in a time of trauma, anxiety or extreme stress? Okay, maybe funny isn’t the word. It is quite a miracle and blessing that humans can form a connection so quickly in times of need. What is even more beautiful is the nurse who chose to make this her life path; to help strangers with kindness and compassion in very stressful moments.

Nurses, Doctors, Firemen, Police Officers, Caregivers, are often there for strangers on our most horrible or trying days. The men and women who stand with folks in their community to help them through it all, are very much a blessing to humanity. Not everyone is wired to be able to have a heart, so giving and open, to hold a stranger’s hand even on a regular day with no stress.

Do some people hold more compassion inside then others? I think so. But what I find is that even those of us who aren’t comfortable with unfamiliar people will still offer comfort in times of duress, even if they too are stressed. Is this a characteristic built into our DNA, to care for others when it is most needed? Is it an innate knowing that we are all connected by the spark of God, that brings us all to life? I do not know. But I’d like to think so.

What I do know is that I am very thankful for the nurse who held my hand that day. She kindly offered me comfort and did her best to divert my attention from the surgery happening while we talked. I cannot help but use this scenario as an analogy of life.

It is on our hardest, most challenging days, that we need others help us get through.

Unfortunately, these days aren’t always as obvious as being strapped to an operating table. Sometimes there are strangers walking past us in the grocery store or working in the cubicle right next to you; that are having one of the worst days of their lives. Inner trauma is just as painful as physical trauma, just in a different way.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all live heart-centered lives so that others would feel safe in asking; “Will you please hold my hand?” when they need it most?

Even if it is just for a short time, your compassion does make a difference. Kindness is a characteristic that we must practice to be good at. Seeing folks in our community as extended family, instead of strangers, is where we can start. Do unto others and such. Remember, even a kind stranger serving as a short distraction from pain (in any form) can make a huge difference in the world.

Thank you for reading my blog today.

May you find comfort and love all around you. May you have the chance to act as comfort and love to another.

Wishing you an abundance of blessings,

With love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

What do they think of me???

emyminzel

Do you ever find yourself concerned about what others think of you? I think it is human nature to do so. Like First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt said, “What others think of me, is none of my business.” I guarantee Mrs. Roosevelt had undergone just a little ridicule and speculation while serving the longest First Lady residency of the White House to date for twelve years.

Eleanor shook up the norm of the First Lady role, writing her own newspaper column, and played a role in fighting poverty and racial discrimination in the World War II era. I can only imagine how a bold opinionated woman was received in a Congress mostly full of men. This makes me realize how thankful I am for the strong women who fought the status quo in our history to help women get the freedoms we have today.

When I find myself questioning my words, actions or ideas because I am concerned what others think of me it brings anxiety. If you are anything like me; I will run through conversations in my head, wondering what I could have or should have done better.

Here are a few questions I ask myself that help me put my mind at ease with my deeds, and conversations.

  • Did I speak my truth?
  • Was I kind?
  • Was I able to keep calm and collected?
  • Did I give the other party an opportunity to speak their truth?
  • If there is no compromise of opinion, did we respectfully to agree to disagree?
  • Did I hold on to my personal values? And did I allow the other party to do the same?

If I accomplished all these things, I feel okay with my interactions. You and I both know that there are times we don’t get along with everyone. So, when the other party may not like the outcome of our conversation or there is conflict, I start to think, “I wonder what they think of me?”

Truthfully even though I am fully aware ‘what they think of me is none of my business.’ I still do care! I care because I want others to see that I live and act in harmony with my beliefs. I believe in being kind and compassionate to every living being I come across in life, and although I know this is my intention, I want this to come across to those I interact with.

Yet I have learned I must be strong and stand firmly in my truth. I will not be happy if I allow myself to be steamrolled or bullied into silence. Standing up for yourself can be uncomfortable, especially if you encounter someone who does not show you respect to be authentically you.

I’ve met some people who seemed like unkind, selfish, mean, bullies in my day. Yet as I grow older, I see beyond their actions and see the pain underneath that makes them act out in this way. Maybe that person has not been shown compassion or kindness themselves? Maybe they were raised in a very totalitarian home with no empathy and not allowed to show emotion?

Clearly a person whom cannot practice compassion has not been shown it. These are the people who seem to have the loudest opinions and greater tendency to have behaviors such as: punish harshly, belittle, or bully others. When I have an interaction with folks like this it stays with me for days because it feels so icky.

Then I ask myself, “What did I do to bring this situation to myself? Was I part in escalating this uncomfortable situation or an innocent bystander of emotional violence?” I know that I am opinionated myself and am hardly ever completely innocent when it comes to debating with those with differing opinions. Yet how I interact with the world around me is very important to me.

I try very hard to be the best me I can be. I try to raise vibes, not lower them.

So, while it is true that “What others think of me is none of my business.” I still go back to those questions (see list above) and hold myself up to the personal standards I have set. I feel like when I answer those questions, I know if I can rest easy with my actions or if I have some room for improvement.

It is important to stand firmly in my truth, and to be okay when others do not like or agree with me. Because what I think of myself is more important than what others think of me. I know who I am inside and if I am upholding my personal values while feeling a little uncomfortable, I must be okay with that.

While we may always wonder what others think, it’s more important to ask yourself. “What do you, think of you?!” There is always room to grow, there are ways to improve being true to you too!

I imagine this may be what Eleanor Roosevelt was expressing with her quote. “What others think of me is none of my business.”

I hope this blog helped you in some way. I’d love to hear what you think!

Wishing you an abundance of blessings!

With love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

 

 

 

Brave enough to bloom

emyminzel

As a young girl I would often lead my younger cousins down the trails and into the backwoods in Northern Minnesota. Not knowing where they would lead us or if I we could even get back. Never gave a second thought to dangers that may lay ahead. There could have been a Momma black bear with cubs or a snare that may have been set; that I wasn’t even aware to be on the look out for. I was not concerned with any of these dangers as a 10 -year-old child adventurer. I was very loved and felt invincible!

I believe it was because I was so loved, that I always felt safe. I trusted that my family and the Higher Power would take care of me. Obviously, it worked out. I am still here. I even survived my teenage years, my early twenties and into my forties; trusting my curiosity (and family support structure) even if the path it takes me on may seem a little scary at times. Often, I find my curiosity and bravery (even if it is bravado at the time) often lead me to new wonderful experiences.

When Adventure Sister Stacy and I set out on our first trip to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area many years ago, we had no idea what we were getting into. We’d never done anything like it before. We were both just in need of new experiences. We both needed some ‘me’ time at the same time. What would be better then going up the BWCA where the only option there is to ‘rough it’ with the minimum needed to survive and no cell phone signal.

Sure, we were nervous, not to mention that our families were a little worried for us as well. Yet we were strong women who were bound and determined to get away from it all. This decision, to risk going deep into the forest, led to where we are today. Five years later we have written three books about our continued adventures and life experiences spurred on by this one first choice. We chose to be scared but brave and adventurous anyway. Because of this; we are currently working to get our trilogy published.

I find, that when I am bored with my day to day routines, I look for something different to try to spice-up my life. Some years it’s wondering into the forest. Some years its contemplating the risk to write and share my personal stories and art with the world.

 This year, my curiosity and drive to make a difference in the world, led me to run for the State House of Representatives. It was a scary decision to run because I didn’t know what to expect. Yet I am trusting this adventure I’ve been lead to.

Being brave does not mean you are not aware that you are vulnerable. It means you see the risks, you contemplate how it will affect you, and even weigh the judgment of others. Sometimes you know that if it goes bad, it might go really bad. Then I choose to chance it anyway. Or not.

I choose to do this because of the support and love of my family and friends who will catch me if I fall. Often, in adulting, we know that others are depending on us. So we choose their concerns and wellbeing over doing what our souls call to us to do.

After I became a mother, I settled down pretty darn quick. Yet now that she is grown and out of the house, I feel that it’s okay to start taking some calculated risks again. I believe, that in our society, we have gotten to the point where fear is ruling our decisions and even impeding our growth.

Change is scary and taking chances are risky. But I feel that if I do not try or even take small steady steps in the direction I wish to go, then I will always be in the same place. There is no mental or spiritual growth in staying in the same place. Without new experiences in my life, I get bored.

There is no innovation or progress if we are content with the status quo of our life. Is this why life feels uncomfortable at times? To make us want to keep moving forward to a possible ‘better’ life? Maybe the Universe puts opportunities, to take those chances and risks, in front of us for this reason.

I believe in chasing your interests, dreams and drive to where your heart calls you because it’s calling you for a reason… The reason why you were put here on earth in the first place. I also believe all our wondering, inclinations, and inquisitive yearnings are instilled in you to lead you to your life’s purpose. Probably why I was a political junkie and so interested in environmental protections for the last ten years.

Life is sometimes scary when it asks us to level up in our efforts. Whether it is starting a new job or a new life, with a move far from the home you’ve known, it can challenge our bravery. What I find scarier though is staying the same and not giving myself the opportunity to grow.

I strive to grow so much that I bloom over and over again. By bloom, I mean to help to make the world just a little more beautiful than it already is, by increasing my effort to benefit the greater good. I strive to be send positive vibes out to the Universe because it needs it.

I realize I am blessed with an abundance of love in my life. I have come to see love as the water I need to bloom where I am planted. I bloom by being brave enough to first crack open the cocoon of my soul’s seed. My soul’s desires sometimes seem to be fertilized by the darkness that makes me ache to reach for the sun.

At times I crave the growth so strongly that it allows me to overcome my fears. I believe being brave, even when I am scared, has turned out to be the best way to bloom into the life I am meant to live. I was planted on this path; I might as well trust it because it was meant to be.

I believe divine guidance is always taking place in my life and if I don’t trust my path, I stall my growth. Yes, being brave is hard and scary but I recommend you try it anyway. Nobody likes to be stuck in fertilizer too long!

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings today and always! Love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

@EmyforHouse15A

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

Earth Day Everyday!

emyminzel

I spent Earth Day rescuing a big pine tree in the back yard from my dog Hank’s effort to over fertilize it this winter. In short, I celebrated this beautiful sunny Earth Day by raking leaves and cleaning up dog poo. Not glamorous but hey, show me who’s life is glamour’s all the time, and I will gladly call BS.

We all have to deal with some crap once in a while, that’s just life. My dogs Gus and Hank are part of my family, they both sit squarely inside my heart. The fact that I must do the icky stuff like pick up after them is part my love and dedication to them. I want them to feel like they have a clean area to roam and do their business because it is healthier for them.

Maintaining and taking care of something you love, should not be dreaded or disgusting. It’s no different then changing a diaper. People who don’t like to get their hands dirty doing the hard stuff are an enigma to me. I find the return in a hard job well done very rewarding. I love to take care of my family and my animals in the same way I would want to be cared for. I intend to do my best caring for the Earth in the same way.

I like that I find peace in nature whether picking up poo or out adventuring into the wilderness foraging for firewood. I just like to be outdoors. I prefer warm sunshiny days that lift my mood and boost my energy to get things done. If I get to sit by water or climb in a canoe… forgetaboutit!!! That is where I feel closest to Spirit, on the water immersed in Mother Nature’s embrace, feels like Heaven to me.

Spring has finally sprung in Central Minnesota and I could not be any happier! There maybe still snow on the ground but we still have plenty of nature to enjoy. The mosquitoes are not quite out yet, the sandhill cranes are laughing in the pond by the garden. Sounds like they are enjoying a party every evening as the sun sets. I kind of want to join them in the festivities!

Spending time outside, tending to nature and the ones I love, is one of life’s simple enjoyments. The kind that money can’t buy, the kind that only have value to your soul. Being outside in nature nurtures us in a way we can’t describe but also can’t get enough of.

My daughter and I took our dogs on a walk this evening, now that the snow has melted we also see all the garbage and debris in the ditches and alongside the road. We decided to bring a trash bag and gloves with us next walk. Because caring for something you love even the icky stuff that’s not your fault; is the right thing to do.

Let’s treat the Earth as we would like to be treated. Let’s do our best to keep the water clean, our trash contained and recycled. It is part of our maintenance fees for living here on Earth. The sun is out and the snow is finally leaving. Life is good here at the Minzel home front, even when there is plenty of crap to do, life is good!

I like to celebrate Earth Day every day because Mother Earth needs us to! How do you show you care for the Earth?

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

 

 

Delegating

emyminzel

I am the kind of girl who likes to do things myself. Like my mom likes to say if you want something done right (or the way you like) you must do it yourself. I have had that same train for thought for many years. Often letting it rule most of my time and day.

I wouldn’t allow others to clean because it was not done to my high standards so, I did it myself. I like things to look just so, in the yard, in the house, in my business and so on. I don’t allow others to help me with much of anything really.

Life has taken a drastic change of pace from what I have been used to for the last several years. I had the time and energy to do everything I wanted done myself. Out of necessity, impatience, or shear stubbornness, I have always been self-sufficient.

Until just a few weeks ago when I need to work from the time I wake up answering emails, until bedtime, studying issues for the campaign, working, and writing has left me no time to clean, shop, cook, or even walk the dogs.  All the things still need to get done, I just do not have the time.

This is where the higher power teaches me how to ask for help, and how to delegate. These are not things that come easy or naturally for me. I will ask my husband will pick up something from the store, but I hardly ever ask him to clean the bathroom. The time has come for me to have to ask.

Does it really matter if he doesn’t clean as I would? Does it really matter if the home decorations aren’t dusted or look like they are in the exact right place? Does it matter if I have company come over and there is dog hair on the floor? Probably not. Does it matter if dinner wasn’t cooked the way I would have done it? It doesn’t, in fact it tastes better when I don’t have to cook it!

When it comes to campaign work I find it difficult to delegate even the simplest things like stuffing envelopes. I feel this way because it is my campaign and feel like I should be helping after all! I do like to help. That’s also part of the conundrum I face. I like to be the helper not the helped for some reason…

Going from someone who was able to do it all by myself; to a busy self-employed business owner, writer and Candidate that has more to do then I can get done in a day, is quite a riddle for me. I must learn to let go of how I think things should look and just be grateful that I have help at all.

Delegating is a skill I am working on and it eases my mind is knowing that most people also like to help too. Learning to let go of how I think things should be will help me grow as a person. It also allows others to step up who haven’t had the chance because I never let them. I am also learning it helps to be specific when asking.

Asking for help allows others to support me, when we assist others we feel good. At least I do anyways, and I am going to assume most people feel the same when they feel useful. I believe this lesson is was gentle reminder from up above saying. “Hey you down there, it is okay to ask for help!”

You don’t have to do it all yourself, delegating is entrusting people to help you. This facilitates others feeling good about themselves for being of assistance. It is kind of nice when I put it like that isn’t it?

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

 

*Photo credit: maybusch.com*