Tag: compassion

Will you hold my hand?

emyminzel

Earlier this week, I had a minor surgery to remove a cyst in my neck. The procedure was performed in an operating room. As they wheeled me in, I saw a room full of stainless-steel equipment and nurses bundled up in their surgical garb and masks and remembered I was going to be fully awake for this procedure. The area numbed with Novocain before the doctor was to remove the growth with a scalpel.

Being awake, I made small talk with the nurses, who were very kind and chatted with me too. There was one nurse whose job it was to sit and keep me company, while monitoring my vital signs. I did not think I was nervous since I knew what was going to happen and how it was going to happen. Yet the moment they helped me on to the operating table I seem to have gotten cold feet. I wanted to run away!

When she strapped on the blood pressure cuff, my cover of small talk and cracking jokes was blown! My heartrate and blood pressure were through the roof! Even though I tried to play it cool, statistics showed my body was clearly in fight or flight mode. The nurse, in charge of my vitals, was a welcome distraction from the reality of a large incision being made to my body while awake.

When the doctor walked in, I chatted with her too. She’s become my favorite doctor and I feel very comfortable with her. In my head, I was trying to calm myself, by inducing my own meditative state of breathing deep and such. No luck, my body knew what was going to happen and even though my mind was very logical and factual, my blood pressure was not coming down.

It’s like my body knew trauma was coming and it was very scared. At that moment I knew I needed comfort. I looked at the nurse, who was right next to me the whole time, and asked her. “Will you please hold my hand?”

She obliged kindly and continued to hold my hand for the whole procedure. Doing her best to ask me questions and give me distractions from the doctor and scalpel working diligently behind me. Nurse W told me she was a seasoned nurse, working part-time until retirement. I could tell. She had calmness and caring demeanor only years of practice can produce. It made me feel like I could ask her to help me in the only way she could, by holding my hand.

Isn’t it funny how you can find comfort in a perfect stranger’s hand in a time of trauma, anxiety or extreme stress? Okay, maybe funny isn’t the word. It is quite a miracle and blessing that humans can form a connection so quickly in times of need. What is even more beautiful is the nurse who chose to make this her life path; to help strangers with kindness and compassion in very stressful moments.

Nurses, Doctors, Firemen, Police Officers, Caregivers, are often there for strangers on our most horrible or trying days. The men and women who stand with folks in their community to help them through it all, are very much a blessing to humanity. Not everyone is wired to be able to have a heart, so giving and open, to hold a stranger’s hand even on a regular day with no stress.

Do some people hold more compassion inside then others? I think so. But what I find is that even those of us who aren’t comfortable with unfamiliar people will still offer comfort in times of duress, even if they too are stressed. Is this a characteristic built into our DNA, to care for others when it is most needed? Is it an innate knowing that we are all connected by the spark of God, that brings us all to life? I do not know. But I’d like to think so.

What I do know is that I am very thankful for the nurse who held my hand that day. She kindly offered me comfort and did her best to divert my attention from the surgery happening while we talked. I cannot help but use this scenario as an analogy of life.

It is on our hardest, most challenging days, that we need others help us get through.

Unfortunately, these days aren’t always as obvious as being strapped to an operating table. Sometimes there are strangers walking past us in the grocery store or working in the cubicle right next to you; that are having one of the worst days of their lives. Inner trauma is just as painful as physical trauma, just in a different way.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all live heart-centered lives so that others would feel safe in asking; “Will you please hold my hand?” when they need it most?

Even if it is just for a short time, your compassion does make a difference. Kindness is a characteristic that we must practice to be good at. Seeing folks in our community as extended family, instead of strangers, is where we can start. Do unto others and such. Remember, even a kind stranger serving as a short distraction from pain (in any form) can make a huge difference in the world.

Thank you for reading my blog today.

May you find comfort and love all around you. May you have the chance to act as comfort and love to another.

Wishing you an abundance of blessings,

With love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

What do they think of me???

emyminzel

Do you ever find yourself concerned about what others think of you? I think it is human nature to do so. Like First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt said, “What others think of me, is none of my business.” I guarantee Mrs. Roosevelt had undergone just a little ridicule and speculation while serving the longest First Lady residency of the White House to date for twelve years.

Eleanor shook up the norm of the First Lady role, writing her own newspaper column, and played a role in fighting poverty and racial discrimination in the World War II era. I can only imagine how a bold opinionated woman was received in a Congress mostly full of men. This makes me realize how thankful I am for the strong women who fought the status quo in our history to help women get the freedoms we have today.

When I find myself questioning my words, actions or ideas because I am concerned what others think of me it brings anxiety. If you are anything like me; I will run through conversations in my head, wondering what I could have or should have done better.

Here are a few questions I ask myself that help me put my mind at ease with my deeds, and conversations.

  • Did I speak my truth?
  • Was I kind?
  • Was I able to keep calm and collected?
  • Did I give the other party an opportunity to speak their truth?
  • If there is no compromise of opinion, did we respectfully to agree to disagree?
  • Did I hold on to my personal values? And did I allow the other party to do the same?

If I accomplished all these things, I feel okay with my interactions. You and I both know that there are times we don’t get along with everyone. So, when the other party may not like the outcome of our conversation or there is conflict, I start to think, “I wonder what they think of me?”

Truthfully even though I am fully aware ‘what they think of me is none of my business.’ I still do care! I care because I want others to see that I live and act in harmony with my beliefs. I believe in being kind and compassionate to every living being I come across in life, and although I know this is my intention, I want this to come across to those I interact with.

Yet I have learned I must be strong and stand firmly in my truth. I will not be happy if I allow myself to be steamrolled or bullied into silence. Standing up for yourself can be uncomfortable, especially if you encounter someone who does not show you respect to be authentically you.

I’ve met some people who seemed like unkind, selfish, mean, bullies in my day. Yet as I grow older, I see beyond their actions and see the pain underneath that makes them act out in this way. Maybe that person has not been shown compassion or kindness themselves? Maybe they were raised in a very totalitarian home with no empathy and not allowed to show emotion?

Clearly a person whom cannot practice compassion has not been shown it. These are the people who seem to have the loudest opinions and greater tendency to have behaviors such as: punish harshly, belittle, or bully others. When I have an interaction with folks like this it stays with me for days because it feels so icky.

Then I ask myself, “What did I do to bring this situation to myself? Was I part in escalating this uncomfortable situation or an innocent bystander of emotional violence?” I know that I am opinionated myself and am hardly ever completely innocent when it comes to debating with those with differing opinions. Yet how I interact with the world around me is very important to me.

I try very hard to be the best me I can be. I try to raise vibes, not lower them.

So, while it is true that “What others think of me is none of my business.” I still go back to those questions (see list above) and hold myself up to the personal standards I have set. I feel like when I answer those questions, I know if I can rest easy with my actions or if I have some room for improvement.

It is important to stand firmly in my truth, and to be okay when others do not like or agree with me. Because what I think of myself is more important than what others think of me. I know who I am inside and if I am upholding my personal values while feeling a little uncomfortable, I must be okay with that.

While we may always wonder what others think, it’s more important to ask yourself. “What do you, think of you?!” There is always room to grow, there are ways to improve being true to you too!

I imagine this may be what Eleanor Roosevelt was expressing with her quote. “What others think of me is none of my business.”

I hope this blog helped you in some way. I’d love to hear what you think!

Wishing you an abundance of blessings!

With love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

 

 

 

I want to help!

emyminzel

 

There are so many ways to help better ourselves and our communities yet sometimes we have a hard time finding our perfect fit. What pulls at my heartstrings and makes me want to donate time and energy, may not be what drives you! Yet you should not let that stop you from finding a way to share your light with the world around us.

Lots of people want to spend their Thanksgiving donating time by preparing meals for those less fortunate. As much as this is on your mind, this time of year, these food shelves, homeless shelters, and community meal kitchens also need help the rest of the year.

So, when you are thinking of donating your time to these humanitarian causes on the holiday, please open your mind to the immense need beyond Christmas and Thanksgiving Day. There are 350 other days in the year in which your help is very much needed and appreciated!

The food shelf donations and volunteering – You can volunteer to sort and expedite at your local food shelf. All you need to do is call! You can also ask your friends and family to organize donation sites at work, school, church or other regular gathering spots! Did you know you can donate more than food, they will also accept nonperishables like diapers and toilet paper too. You can also always donate cash. Did you know that they can usually purchase more with your dollar than you can?

Diaper Drive – Speaking of diapers, there is a huge need at women’s shelters and food shelves. Diapers are expensive and often in high demand. Consider expanding your donations beyond food.

Tent City or Homeless shelter donations – More and more we see the homeless population growing around us. Mercy comes from regular folks like you and I, who expand our compassion by serving those less fortunate. We could take it upon ourselves to ask our friends, family or work for donations of water, hot food, blankets, winter jackets, boots, hats, gloves, socks, toothpaste and brushes etc… put these together in mercy baskets, then drive and deliver the goods to the souls in tent city to help them survive the winter in tents.

Not by these any of these sites? You can always dig around and use your detective skills to see if you have an invisible homeless population in your hometown. I am a big believer in supporting my local community. Often Churches take donations for homeless or low-income individuals in small town areas. All you must do is inquire and help.

Animal Rescue – there are so many great animal rescue organizations popping up all over the place. Lots of them have found that keeping pets in a foster home, where they are treated like a part of the family, has the best outcome for the health and demeanor of the pet. When the pet feels cared for, instead of locked in a cage, they act completely different and are more likely to be adopted into their forever home. Consider donating dishes, food, collars, toys and maybe even open your home to a pet in need. I have found fostering dogs has been a heart opening experience that changed me for the better. Animal shelters need volunteers and money too, I choose to support no-kill shelters.

Money – donations are always greatly appreciated. If you don’t have time or energy, you can still help by donating your dollars to those causes that are near and dear to your heart.

I like to donate to www.savetheboundarywaters.org and www.ruffstartrescue.org. Both organizations that I feel deeply passionate about.

Environmental Help – I would also like to support organizations that are helping families, firemen, animals and other victims of the California fires. I found this article interesting, so I will share the link.

https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2018/11/california-camp-woolsey-wildfires-help-charity-donations.html

Do your research on who you want to donate to. Make sure they are reputable and responsible with your dollars, so you can be proud of your donation. There are many other options such as driving for Meals on Wheels and donating blood or plasma.

As a final point, I also believe that random acts of kindness are still a thing!  Share your light as often as you can and watch how others do the same.

We are blessed to be here on this beautiful planet with plenty to be thankful for. I hope this has helped bring some ideas for you to share your light! I’m thankful for you, and I believe in you.

Namaste!

Wishing you an abundance of joy and blessings, this holiday and throughout the year!

With love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

 

Earth Angels

emyminzel

I believe the world is a much kinder place then the news likes to lead on. I believe that everyday citizens like you and I, are great people who love our families, community and Country. I believe most people in all countries want the same thing for themselves and their loved ones too. No matter how different we are. I believe people would not flee their homeland if they felt secure and free. I believe everyone should have their needs met.

We all want and need clean water and air, nutritious food, our health, a safe warm place to live with a purpose to be alive. These are the essential elements of what makes us feel safe and fully free to enjoy life. When we are missing any of these we feel it intensely in every area of ourselves, mind, body, spirit.

I believe young children are the best example of what it means to fully enjoy being human. They run around learning new things all day, eating lunch, taking naps, not wondering or worrying about how their needs are going to be met. They just trust that they are. What a wonderful life we live for the first six years. Life gets more complicated as we grow but we still have the same needs.

I love that most of our Country is empathetic to those less fortunate who still have needs they need met. I see that from small to larger communities’ people are helping neighbors. Fellow citizens joining forces to form compassionate community groups doing their best to fill the gap for those in need that seem to slip through the systems already in place.

I see churches helping the homeless, I see children making donations to those in need out of their own funds. I see groups making backpacks of love filled with things that a child would need if taken to a foster home in an emergency. There are Earth Angels everywhere.I see communities’ organize angels of empathy groups that fill our towns, cities and states performing acts of kindness of all natures.

I believe compassion fills this Country no matter what the news tells us, I believe we are better people then they want us to believe. Maybe even better then we believe we are ourselves. Once we look past our perceived grievances we find we are not so different at all, that’s when the compassion can kick in. We see ourselves in others.

More Americans than not, know what it is like to have one or more of these needs lacking in our adult lives. We know that asking for help is hard, and we worry nobody will help us. That is when I see compassionate communities take care of each other by uniting and cooperating, regular people like you stepping up to do what you can. Funding Angel accounts for kids whose parents can’t afford school lunch, Go-Fund Me accounts that literally saving lives. I know you see it too.

Today’s blog goal it to remind you; you are good, you matter, I believe in you earth angels.

YOU CAN AND DO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD.

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

*Disclaimer; this picture was saved from the internet many years ago, I do not know who to give credit to. If it is you I will gladly do so.

Dear Millennial’s, I believe in you

emyminzel

Dear Millennial’s,

I am sorry you did not have the chance to live in the simplistic childhood us ‘older’ people had the privilege to enjoy. I am only twenty years older than you though it sounds like a lot of years, it’s not. When I was young we got to run our neighborhoods from sun up until sundown without having to ‘check in’ too often because we felt safe and so did our parents.

Never once did I fear someone snatching me while playing outside with my friends on the other side of town. Never once was I scared or even slightly concerned about being shot at school. Never once were we scared to leave home without a phone. We are only a few decades apart give or take, yet our childhoods were completely different.

If I was scared, I could knock on any of my neighbor’s doors and know for certain I could find refuge or help I needed as a child. I was raised a free-range kid and I loved every bit of it. I was given responsibility and trust to behave myself to hold my friend’s hands while crossing the street on the way to the corner candy store to spend .50 cents and get a half a brown bag full of penny candies or a giant freeze pop the size of my seven-year-old body.

Can you imagine letting your seven-year-old out of your sight now days? Its unheard of. You would never see a child in the store by themselves today. But for me and the neighborhood kids back in the eighties it was common daily occurrence if we were lucky enough to get some spare change from our parents. The world we lived in wasn’t nearly as scary as the world we raised you in. I am so sincerely sorry for that.

We got our driver’s license at sixteen without all the fuss you go through today. Drivers Ed was provided at school it was the coolest, we learned to drive with our friends or classmates in the car. We were given more responsibility which made us feel like we had freedom to roam the world at sixteen. It’s incredibly hard to get a job at sixteen now, I’ve discovered most places wont even hire you until your eighteen.

In the 90’s there were plenty of jobs to go around I was working for Burger King at the age of 14 which wasn’t the worst thing in the world because it gave me money to spend at the roller skating rink or for gas to cruise the main street. Our childhoods and school year experiences were drastically different then yours. If we had a problem with someone it never occurred to us that they may shoot us. There were fist fights behind the school, no weapons allowed. Not anything to be proud of, there were bullies, but no body died.

Your generation is one of the first to be bombarded by over stimulation constant information overwhelming you with real news, fake news, bullshit unrealistic programs like the Kardashians and scare tactic news. There is no scientific study that I know of that shows the effect of over stimulation to children but your it, you’re the experiment and I feel like you must learn how to shut it off.

I promise it’s okay and necessary to unplug. You must learn to go outside and cut the noise, so you can listen to the voice inside of you that knows the beautiful soul you are. When you take time preferably out in nature to quiet your mind, magical things happen, you heal yourself from the inside out. This constant noise is not normal, it is not the way of the world, you can and must relax and step away from technology and into nature as often as possible. Its imperative to your soul. Please take to heart that nobody can make you happy but you. Happiness is an inside job.

I am a late bloomer, I went back to school in my thirties and got to borrow money with high interest rates just like you. Had I chosen to go to college at 18 I would have qualified for help and gone to college for a discounted rate that doesn’t seem to be an option for many students now days. I understand the unfairness of the financial burdens thrust upon you just to try and get a head with your education in the real world. This was not always the way of our country, and I do not understand why older people can’t or choose not to see that. Please know we are not all like that. I see you and I feel compassion for your uphill fight.

I am sorry older generations belittle your contribution to the world when what you truly bring to society is compassion and sensitivity to a hardened world that sorely needs you. Please do not give up, I believe in you. I support your drive and passion for a healthier planet, and a more inclusive community, country and world. I love how your generation is unconditionally accepting and supportive of others who are labeled different then you. I see how you care for other less fortunate, I see how beautiful you really are.

I understand that the few of you are caught up in drugs or called trouble or labeled as lazy, but this is the way of the world in all generations. Do not let the debauchery of a few mask the goodness of a whole generation of heart centered innovative creators of our future.

I am sorry society has been hell bent on heavily punishing you for mistakes instead of teaching you the right way and giving you the opportunity to grow and learn from them. I am sorry you had to be overwhelmed with more information you could handle before you were ten. You’ve had access to more information then the previous generations ever had before we were adults.

But listen to me, you are smarter than previous generations no matter what they tell you. Right now, in history you have more access to wisdom and power at your fingertips to learn all you ever wanted to know. You have this incredible opportunity to seize all the information you need to organize and change the world for the better. You are our future and I believe in you. I believe your generation will lead us into a sustainable healthier way of life.

Our older generations and the one before them were taught not to talk about politics or how much we got paid, women were not equal. If you were a minority well, I can’t speak to that, but this is why I love and believe in your generation. You are accepting of everyone no matter how different they are, you need to know how this is so important. Please use your dream of a better world to do what we did not know we could do.

We didn’t know we had any power or influence because we were purposely distracted from participating in how government was ran by being told it wasn’t ‘polite’ to talk about politics. I call BS. Being told to not talk about uncomfortable important stuff, led to dis-involvement in our community and we paid no attention to important deformation of our government that allowed giant gender pay gaps, corporate rule, and a patriarch society that we thought of as normal. Which it is not.

There is no greater transparency as there is today in how our systems are ran, we are at a point in history where we know what we are doing wrong and have science to prove how we can fix it. The dying old school way of ruling the free world with an iron fist in false fear and keep us from thinking you can make a difference. When reality is that you can, and I believe you will make the difference we need to see in the world. Millennial’s I believe in you.

Do not be scared to stand up for what you believe, it is imperative to the world that you do not shrink yourselves. Do not be scared to get involved in what makes you mad, moves your soul, or moves your passions. It is what you were born to do. Even if you can’t do exactly what it is you want, do something close that will lead you there eventually. Patience, dedication and putting one foot in front of the other no matter how long it takes is the only way to success no matter what the television tells you.

P.s. Turn off that stupid t.v. spend as little time as possible on the phone or computer, its keeping you distracted and scared of the beautiful world around you.

I believe when you participate in the world, you will change it for the better. This I know for sure. The world needs you, Millennials you are here for a reason, I believe in you. I believe in a kinder world, healthy environment, and fair government, I believe your generation is going to be the one to usher us in to the peace we are seeking. I believe when you start to pay attention to the workings of the world you will wake up and chose to change it for the better.

I believe you can use the information at your fingertips to research what is that calls to your soul. I believe your time is coming to make your voices heard. I believe that sometimes our children are much wiser then their parents who can be stuck in the illusion of ‘this is how we’ve always done it, so this is how it goes’ this way of thinking is just not healthy or right.

Do not let someone’s opinion of you mean more to you then your own opinion of you. You get to make the rules for your life and if you start now, the happier your future will be. I believe in you Millennials and all younger generations. I am so proud of you when you stand up for what is right, when you stand up for the underdog and when you stand up justice. This is your time to rise, your time to shed light on the world, its your time to be heard.

No matter what you think or been told, the world is listening to you. I am of an older generation and I believe in you.

“The vote is the most powerful form of protest you can do.” Congressman John Lewis

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com