Flawed perfectionist

One week into the Adventure Sisters 90-day meditation challenge, and I am not failing but I am not doing as well as I hoped. I am not smoking, which is a great thing, and one of the reasons why I decided to jump on board the 90-day experiment with Stacy. I am doing things to manage my stress in healthier ways then I was a week ago. I’m not meditating like a monk yet…

Do I really think it would be possible to learn to mediate like a monk in a week? Why do I set such unrealistic goals for myself? I mean, Monks dedicate their lives to the spiritual practice and I seem to think I can master it in 90 days or less!? Come on girl!

This is not unusual behavior for me, yet when I choose to let the world know what I am up to; like weekly reporting on how I am progressing on the meditation challenge it becomes clear. Things that I didn’t see, are blatant and suddenly coming into my perception. Hello, my name is Emy and I am a flawed perfectionist. I don’t like being so particular all the time, it makes my life more difficult than it has to be!

Today I had a meeting with a wonderful woman I met on the campaign trail. It was about a thirty-minute drive to meet her, so I took the opportunity to turn the radio off and not meditate of course but relaxed and focus on my breath work. I OM’d down the road for fifteen minutes.

It worked, I felt calm when I got the meeting, and we had lovely conversations. Today is not a stressful day. It was very nice actually, yet as I write to report back about my meditation experience, I feel like I could have done better. Not because I am stressed but because I missed a day or two over Mother’s Day weekend.

I had company and a fun filled weekend that didn’t leave much time to meditate. I did still take a few minutes before I got out of bed in the morning to gather my thoughts and say thanks for the day ahead. This really does help me adjust my attitude for the whole day.

Yet I am having trouble taking the time for myself to ‘check out’ relax, or step outside to clear my mind. Behaviors that were cloudy now become clear. Now that I know I like to clear my thoughts while moving my body or being outdoors I can move forward with making sure I schedule these things in my day.

This realization that I don’t make time for myself, will change how I will be implementing my plan going forward into the second week of the meditation challenge. I am choosing to schedule me-time and take it. I will make sure I put it at a specific time that will work the best for me on that particular day, so I am more inclined to achieve my goal.

One day it maybe morning the other may be afternoon or evening. There is no right or wrong time or way to take a few minutes to clear my mind, relax my body and check in with my soul. I will release the thought of perfecting meditation or how I think it looks and just do what feels right for me.

I do feel less stressed then when I started, and that’s a good thing.

How is it going with your attempt at our 90-day meditation? Are you doing well? Are you struggling some like me? I would love to hear from you.

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

Meditation contemplations

Seemingly, I lost my meditating mojo… the last week has been fun and busy with campaigning. Yet, on Monday, I forced myself to lay down to quiet my mind even though I had a lot to do. Tuesday, I visited the state Capital and was out in the city most the day.

I did have some quiet time while sitting in the park at the capital across from the food trucks. I sat on a park bench, trying to breathe deeply while relaxing my mind. This worked for about one minute. I cannot relax in the middle of the city.

When I got home I just wanted to unwind, drink some wine, eat some pizza, blog and go to bed. That’s what I did. Even though I enjoyed these meetings and activities, I am only human, and I do need some quiet time to myself or I feel anxious.

Wednesday I worked all day then had a great DFL meeting that kept me out past my bedtime. Wouldn’t you know it, even though I was tired as I crawled into bed, I could not fall to sleep until after 2am.

As I lay there, meditating, breathing, tossing and turning like a rotisserie chicken, I thought “this is so weird, I know I am a professional at this sleep thing, get to it!”

When I have a ton of things to accomplish I stay awake in bed thinking about them, so I don’t forget. Even though, I have seven lists on my desk… so I don’t forget. I know I am not alone on this.

I was laying in bed for hours, doing every meditation technique I could think of, I still could not calm my mind enough fall to sleep.

This meditating the stress away is harder than I thought it would be. I have stress on top of my stress and now I feel stressed about not being able to release this stress. I will be checking out a few of the Mediation Apps Stacy recommended!

Today I am going to try a different technique. I am going to do a walking meditation and I am also going to spend some time in my garden freeing my asparagus patch from the weeds that intrude every spring. Spending so much time in front of the computer is starting to get to my spirit.

I realized that I like to move, it occurred to me that I like to move because it calms my mind.  I like to pick weeds, plant flowers, cook, walk the dogs because being out in nature is healing for me. Even if I sit on the porch with the laptop while I write, I seem to feel much more relaxed.

The point of meditation is relaxing so that you lower your stress level. I was trying to ‘fit it in’ when really, I found that, I do my best first thing in the morning when I wake up, if I take ten or fifteen minutes to give thanks for waking up and decide that I am going to have a great day.

This gives me the opportunity to decide how my day will look instead of absorbing the vibes of others throughout the day. When I decide today is going to be wonderful, productive and pleasant the moment I wake up. I then my brain responds to make it happen.

I will keep this habit for the rest of the challenge because it seems to work the best on my attitude about how I perceive the schedule of my day. If I ‘think’ its going to be stressful, then I manifest myself a difficult day. When I decide I am going seize the day, I do. Things seem to fall in line, I get things done and my anxiety takes some time off.

Even though I am no Yogi, I have learned what type of meditation or activity makes me FEEL the best. What I can do to effectively reduce the anxiety I feel during my day is not what I thought it would look like and that is great! The more you know the better you do, right?!

How are you doing managing your stress? Which apps do you find the most helpful? I would love to hear from you!

For Meditation App reviews check out Stacy’s blog at stacycrep.com

Namaste!

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

Meditate the weight away?

Adventure Sister Stacy texted yesterday and told me she is starting a 90-day, daily meditation challenge to see if she could reduce stress. Her reasons being that stress causes us to produce too much cortisol. The hormone that makes you retain weight around your middle.

Stacy is a holistically trained RN and Yogi with an abundance of knowledge on how the effect our mind, body, spirit connection can truly change your life. Hence the meditation weight loss experiment/adventure. If we can meditate a short while every day for 90 days, we may have success in managing our stress and our weight.

I asked if we could do it together to keep each other accountable. We both had the same reasoning for doing this 90-day meditation stress reducing adventure, we wanted to try relaxing extra pounds of stress away in a healthy way.

I thought. “You know what? I’ve tried crazier diets. Let’s give this one a whirl!”

I had another reason, I used to smoke cigarettes…. I absolutely one hundred percent without a doubt in my mind know that smoking is one of the most destructive things you can do to your own body. I have started up again randomly here and there to deal with stress. I am not proud, I wanted to stop.

I am an intelligent person. I know this is not good for me in anyway. I decided this old habit of stress management is not acceptable. I am in control of how I choose to relax and manage stress. I am choosing to cope with my stress in healthier way! If I can lose weight well that would be great!

Besides, I used to be good at this meditation stuff. I would even add chakra stones, and sound healing to my meditation practice. I could let my mind wander and relax for an hour or more. Now, life has me chasing my tail on the campaign trial, while working and writing. The time I have to myself lately is far different then I have been used to and it is causing me stress and anxiety.

I started the mediation adventure on Monday. I had a campaign team meeting scheduled at my house that evening. I had several things to accomplish that day but knew I had to get my meditation in. Stacy and I had not talked about the amount of time we would dedicate to this experiment. We knew that we would both do the best we can in the time and space we are given.

As late afternoon approached, and I knew I must get my meditation in before team arrived. I am so thankful and blessed to work from home. I was not in the relaxing meditating frame of mind so decided to put on a beauty face mask that required me to lay down on for twenty minutes or it would fall off…. I was basically forcing myself to lay down and relax.

As I laid there I thought, “I can do this.” Approximately two seconds into my meditation, my thoughts started up.

“I have to write that phone script, I have to email my team, I have to make sure dinner is made, I have to do, to do, to do… blah, blah, blah….”

I decided to focus on breathing and counting my breaths in and out.

“I cannot let stress win. The timer on my phone is going to go off any minute, right? I have things to do.

Relax gosh darn it…. Sigh…. I used to be good at this.”

I was able to relax my mind after a few minutes. It is not important to not think at all. That’s almost impossible for most of us! It is important to calm your thoughts and not respond to them with emotions that get you feeling uneasy. Meditation is easier for me when I have a mantra that I repeat to myself to keep my mind from wondering so I did that.

“I am peaceful, I am joyful, I am love.”

The first day of our 90-day meditation adventure was a good experience. They say when you don’t have time to relax. That is exactly when you need to relax! As a massage therapist and energy worker I know this is true. I must practice what I preach and treat my body, mind, and spirit connection with respect if I want to feel my best.

Yet, I just can’t believe how uncomfortable it is to relax somedays!

I can do this, I need to do this for myself. It is going to be a challenge fitting in time to reflect when the list of ‘to do’s’ keeps getting longer. But I guess that is the whole point. Taking care of myself by managing my stress should be on the list every day too.

I feel I tend to put other people and tasks ahead of my needs and I will not continue that. I choose take time for myself so that I can be the best me I can be.

We would love to hear your meditation tips if you choose to take the 90-day meditation challenge with the Adventure Sisters.

We are going to blog once a week about our mediation results so please make sure you follow Stacy’s blog at stacycrep.com

Namaste!

Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com