I have been making a lot of new friends this year, which I enjoy very much! Of course, when I meet new people, I usually try to be as kind as possible. I believe in treating others the way you would like to be treated. I have learned, from my Grandmothers’ example, to live your beliefs. I have chosen, as my religious practice, to offer kindness and compassion to every living being I come across.
Lately, I have been hearing; “You are so nice!” or “She is so nice!” when I hear them talk to others about me. I find this very flattering and it makes ‘me’ feel wonderful that I leave others feeling good! This is exactly how I want others to feel if I can help it. But if I am being totally honest, my husband laughs a little, when he hears it too…
Like all folks, I have many qualities, some of which are very opposite! The longer you know someone, the more you get to know them, right?! My best friend of thirty years gave me a birthday card earlier last month that said.
“You’re the Birthday Queen today! You should be honored, worshipped, and just a little bit feared…. Just like every day!”
We both found the card to be quite hilarious! Because this girl knows me very well after three decades of friendship. She has seen the me that will stand up for myself when needed.
I enjoy making people feel good when they are around me. What a blessing to be able to do so! Not everyone is as blessed to be as outgoing and comfortable with life as I have learned to be. There are times I have my moments, though. When I am not feeling so secure and acting kind. In those moments, others feel comfortable enough to think they can bully me… Ha! Wrong.
I try my very hardest to keep calm with the people whom I adamantly disagree with. But… Let me tell you. This girl also knows when to stop being so darn nice. It is not my favorite way to communicate but sometimes I feel I must be clear with my boundaries by being clear with my actions, if my words are not being respected. Sometimes I choose to act by walking away, other times I choose to stand and fight; with my words of course.
For me fighting is exhausting and kindness is energizing. I would rather work to practice respecting others, just as they are, if they are respectful in return. We do not have to agree on everything, but I do demand the respect of being treated civil, regardless. I find that there are more favorable outcomes, even in times of strife, when we do our best to listen and practice gentleness.
I was raised by single my mom, who was supported by my aunties and her girlfriends that became my ‘adopted aunties’. My mom surrounded me with strong, opinionated and independent women who raised me to be the same. Be nice but take no shit! I was also a free-range kid given trust to ‘be good’ and allowed to roam without worry. This cultivated my adventurous spirit. It helped me learn to explore what interested me, to be brave and to trust my instincts.
There have been times in my life that I have not always been so nice. When I had more toughness then kindness in me but now I choose to live with more kindness and patience. It took me many years to know when to lose my cool and when not too. It is true that with age comes wisdom.
I believe I had to go through those experiences to learn the lessons I needed to grow as a person. Life has taught me that I much prefer to go through life being kind, but at the same time, being firm with my boundaries. You CAN be kind and tough all at the same time! I believe everyone embodies these yin yang traits. These experiences have taught me that I like to be nice!
I believe that kindness is like my religion. I practice kindness as often as I can, it is my way to “practice what I preach”. I very much wish to be a light in a sometimes, dark world. However, given enough time, my new friends will see the duality that lives within me and everyone else. I can only hope they accept my humanness with kindness themselves.
I love being kind. I love that kindness is the energy I choose to share with the world around me, as often as possible.
Which energy do you share the most?!
Wishing you an abundance of joyful blessings,
Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister
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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister