Category: #spiritual

#lifelessons, #signs, #spiritual

Alchemizing Uncertainty

emyminzel

I am learning to embrace the architectural alchemy of uncertainty. What does that mean? It means I build as I go trusting each step is divinely guided. No one knows what the future holds, yet we still plan as if we can control it. They say the greatest journey begins with a single step, and so does the intentional building of a life.

To step off the cliff into the unknown, to rebuild with broken pieces, both inside and out, is its own form of alchemy. One does not become an expert in anything without first being the dutiful apprentice. To create something that endures, one must rely on firsthand experiences that slowly form the artist’s talent and style from within. So, the Universe gives me courses in life lessons that allow me to practice. Each one crafted to level up my skills, relentlessly.

The divine essence that lives within speaks to us all if we listen. I have learned to move in silence, wisely conserving my energy. Time is all we have and how I spend it shows the Universe where I am invested. It took many laborious lessons and decades before I learned to monitor my own energy bank and build firm boundaries. Intentionally directing my time and energy inward for my own use; instead of scattered willy nilly among those who will greedily siphon it until it is empty.

Trusting my instincts as guideposts is not for the faint of heart. Becoming an Architect of Uncertainty requires trial and error, lessons learned through collapse, and the courage to sift through rubble for treasures of wisdom. Instinct tells me I will need those fragments again.

My instinct for alchemy is not born from reading clever quotes found online. My intuition was forged in the dark, painful fire from which my personal phoenix has risen— so exquisite I know I inevitably risk entrapment again if I am not vigilant. Navigating uncertainty of the future is guided by trusting in my intuition and the divine downloads that lead me toward action.

Since I came into this world, I have been considering how I was born and raised Feral. Clutching wild untamable energy so tightly even the Universe let me live a semi-Feral free-range life. Never truly nurtured and protected set free to roam. Wisdom of time shows me purpose of my past. Youthful innocence seeking love and affection I was easily lured into dangerous underworld of lessons nobody wants to learn.

It was through these experiences and a lifetime of enduring violations of boundaries. And a couple attempts of others doing my best to break my spirit so completely that nearly snuffed me out. I now contain a remarkable, vastly contrasting and poetically beautiful duality that comes with heavy lessons.

I find my life has been a bit relatable to the story of Persephone the Greek Goddess of Spring, and innocence, who eventually became the Queen of the Underworld, transformation, duality, and resilience. Relatable because like many people who walk around looking fine on the outside…  I do not look like what I have been through.

I am simultaneously soft and stern, sweet and sour. Miraculously my heart remains open because I have learned to find beauty even in pain and keep my light safe in the darkness. I am open because now I can trust myself. Instinctive boundaries built from persistent practice of my lifelong apprenticeship means I am now capable of self-defense in many forms. Yet, I just look like me.

Pain has become a familiar companion of being forged and constructed in fire so often that my metaphorical wings themselves are made of powerful flames. The fire in me recognizes and honor the fire in you instantly. It feels comfortable, even safe, and exciting, because the familiar burn is less terrifying than opening the forbidden door to freedom and self-love. It is not how it looks on the outside. Nothing ever is. This is where my truth resides.

Harnessing the energy of the unknown safely is in the transformation of my own vibrations. Transmuting the circumstances where like attracts like. Commanding that I select the company I keep with the ruthless integrity of my spirits inner knowing. Now, more often than not. I prefer to be alone. I will not slow down my growth for anyone. Catch up or fall off.

Alchemizing uncertainty demands deep internal mining. It means trudging through the heavy weight of defeat, searching for nuggets of golden discernment hidden within. It means tapping into the divinely guided architect of my spirit— finding value in even the smallest diamonds, compressed over years of struggle and determination, mined from the deepest darkest depths of my soul.

Compelled by a mystical force inside endlessly searching for a sacred space that honors my duality and my magic. The magician within me, instinctively cementing treasures back together while knowing that no matter how much gold and grit I gather to rebuild my life; nothing is permanent and the tower will eventually fall again.

The artistic architect within me seems to have a merciless sense of humor and intense drive to continuously re-create myself. Each death and rebirth of my soul has brought to fruition an inner truth. Always reiterating my life path is about how gracefully I go about the journey of gathering gold and making diamonds rather than arriving at the destination on time. Many times, I don’t reach my destination or my goals. The journey never looks the way I thought it would and while learning to trust in that.

The hardest work as the architect of my life is manifesting my prayers and dreams into reality. It comes when I am forced to step into the unknown. Reminding me that I do not need to know how it ends, where it goes, and who is going to be there. I just need to feel my feelings and trust myself. Fully believing that even when I feel as if I am blindfolded in a trust fall into the arms of the Universe… I am certain I will land on my feet.

Though I feel feral, have been abused, abandoned, betrayed by those who were supposed to love me the most.  It has been exhausting continually seeking to design a life that feels like joyful contentment, safety, and freedom on my own.

The infinite love I somehow have the strength to carry inside needs a place to be set down. Yearning for a sacred safe space for it to be shared. Searching for the kind of wholeness I long to experience at least once in this lifetime.

So, with a deep desire for respite and rest. I know me and inevitably this longing for love will find me rebuilding another tower of confinement cloaked in the illusion of security and stability. Where eventually it becomes painfully clear that after all the time and effort, I spent rebuilding yet another beautiful life. Eventually the same yearning for freedom will ignite my flaming wings of feral fire that will burn it all down.

Intuitively knowing that once again it will be time to set myself free in order to stay authentically me. The apprentice architect of uncertainty that holds no regrets because I have now learned it was always about the journey.

Figuring out how to balance the light and the dark within. Alchemizing through a sacred and soulful reckoning of my own duality. To unconditionally love myself and heal the feral innocence within that seeks safety in cages.

#BoundaryWatersCanoeArea, #lifelessons, #spiritual, Political

Finding Home

emyminzel

This essay of finding home, was written for a live reading at my friend Susan’s art studio in Minneapolis. Where women gathered to read their personal experiences of finding home. Susan invited us to share our stories at the yearly Art Districts Art-a-Whirl community event in studio #501. I am thankful for the experience and the opportunity. Not only for sharing my story, but for the chance to answer such a profoundly personal question I had not truly explored until now. Miigwech, to all the women who hold space, share their experience and love with me on my writing journey.  

Finding home.

By Emy Minzel

When Susan invited me to share about finding home… I thought back to my childhood.

I grew up a free-range latchkey kid in Virginia Minnesota.  Which was quite fun! It was also how I learned to love adventure!

I am thankful for the skills I learned back then… many of which, I still use today.

I remember the feeling so free! The world out there was waiting for me to explore it and nobody to tell me I couldn’t! So, that’s what I did.

I would ride my bike all over town, making friends in every direction. Often, I’d get to stay with my grandparents up north in Cook. Where I would wander fearlessly into the forest. Gazing at the clouds, following birds, making friends with the trees. Talking to forest animals and fairies.

Even as a little girl I’ve felt most comfortable outside in nature.

I remember floating in Lake Vermillion looking up in the cloudless blue sky. The sun shining in my eyes and reflecting like diamonds on the surface around me.

The sounds of laughter and people playing at the beach echoed in my water filled my ears. While I was being held up by my grandmother’s arms as she patiently taught me how to back float.

I trusted my grandma Emy more than anyone in the world. I was safe. I was home.

Still so young and innocent I was able to tune into the divine source all around me. My body naturally learned it needed this connection to Mother Nature.

This is where my love of water and nature began.

To this day I recognize that the little girl is still inside. When I catch myself gazing out the window on a nice day. You can trust my thoughts are conspiring to see if there is any way to get outside or into the water.

My spirit still yearns for the freedom of that free-range kid.

To feed the need to run outside and soak up the nourishing minerals of the water and vitamins from the sunshine.

My body still loves to float. It feels like being rocked in a soothing rhythm of a warm womb. The water effortlessly cradles me securely and feeding me love. As if I am plugging into the umbilical cord of the Divine Mother’s feminine embrace.

When I am reconnected to the natural world. My mind, body and spirit feel supported, nourished, cherished.

In these moments I can release my worries.

My spirit releases long sighs of solace.

I am safe.

I am home.

As I grew up my life and home changed. We moved away from my grandma and the familiar small town and water of Lake Vermillion.

Now older and more independent, I found Silver Lake, much smaller and not nearly as grand as Vermillion. Often frozen and covered in snow as it goes in Northern Minnesota.

Yet on sunny winter days someone’s dad or the older kids would shovel the thick layer of snow to reveal a gleaming ice rink. Where I would play on the ice for hours with my friends.

When I was tired, I’d sit on a snowbank gobbling up handfuls of ornate snowflakes for hydration. Appreciating the mosaic beauty glimmering in the ice foundation beneath my skates.

I still got to be on the water. Helping my body still feel connected to nature.

Home continued to evolve as the seasons and cycles of time ensured. I moved even further away.  Which kept me from the water and my grandma for many years.

The demands of adulting had separated the bond I once felt to nature and my Gram.

For many years I felt out of place in the houses and towns in which I lived. They looked and felt heavy as the concrete landscapes.

Emotionally and spiritually, they weighed about the same. Too busy to rest, too loud to listen, too removed to remember.

Eventually I was unable to relate to my own inner knowing. The part of me that knows better. This disconnection made life feel much harder.

Quick showers and environmental toxins of city life started to soak in. Changing the chemistry of my mind and my energy.

I had forgotten the feeling of being nurtured by nature. As I fed my spirit a steady diet of harder hustle and denial.

I was an adult, doing the adulting things. This is what I was supposed to be doing right?

Plugging my ears to my intuition, the life lessons got louder and way more uncomfortable.

Disassociating from the feeling of being lost. I felt like I was just faking it through life.

Like the chlorinated tap water coming from my faucet stripped of all the minerals and lifeless. The lifestyle I was living was like the tap water I was drinking. Neither deep enough to float in, nor healthy enough to nourish my mind, body or spirit.

Eventually giving up to a numb acceptance that dimmed my spirit. I felt destined to accept the slow dehydration of all that I once loved about myself and my life. Pushing through the persistent aching feeling as if I was drowning on dry land.

Though you wouldn’t know it, just lots of us do. I smiled though the pain and kept keeping on.

By then my grandma had passed away. Missing the safety of her steady love that kept me afloat.  My body much older by now. My mind melancholy. My spirit still believing there must be a better way.

It took me far too long to realize I still knew how to swim. It was time to save myself.

I started to meditate and retreat, taking time to find myself. Which allowed me to slow down and listen to the part of me that still knows better. Finally hearing the intuitive whispers still trying to reconnect me with my inner truth.

It was time to find home again.

Life began to reward my efforts for listening. Guiding me with synchronicities that would eventually lead me back to nature and the water…

As the Universe does, it worked, it’s magic. Bringing a new friend into my life!

She reminded me how to play! Which motivated the leveling up of my spiritual journey.

Her friendship felt like a kind, supportive older sister I once knew in another lifetime. 

Our connection was slowly rehydrating my verve for life. Like a fresh cool drink of delicious mineral filled water straight from the garden hose on a hot day.

Our playdates got better and longer, each of us doing our best to add more fun and excitement into our lives.

When we planned an outfitted trip to into the Boundary Waters Canoe Area for the first time at age 38.

 Nervous and excited we joyfully headed north. The return to the familiar evergreen Boreal Forest woke my soul instantly. With the first sniff of nature’s crisp pine aroma therapy.

My spirit nearly screamed. Yes! YES!!!! More please!

We canoed, portaged, played. The stars were plentiful and my eyes wide in wonder.

We had time to be still and absorb all that is good and holy in this world. I was able to see the clear difference in the health of the water around me and inside of me.

Lifting my spirit and opening my heart. Feeling as if the curtains in an abandoned house were open for the first time in years.

We sat in silence on the boulder shore listening to birds sing to the sunrise.

Quietly drinking lake water tea, we witnessed a moose swim past our campsite. A family of loons floated by going in the other direction.

That morning felt like I was participating in a sacred sunrise service. Being baptized by Mother Earth herself. She gave me the blessing of courage to rearrange my outlook on life and the way I was living it.

I floated in the womb of her wisdom until I felt nature Tenderly reconnecting the umbilical cord of my soul to the nurturing spirit of the Divine Mother once again.  

The innocent little girl full of life and love. The part of me I cherish the most. Finally felt safe enough to resurface for a chance to experience a long overdue back float. 

Surrounded by the forest full of cathedral trees and ancient stone formations. I felt alive and inspired!

So inspired I began to sing to the water.

Words flowing from my heart vibrating appreciation to the vast heaven on earth that surrounded me.

“Thank you, water, I love you. Thank you for loving me too.

I value all you do. I’m your friend and you my friend too.”

When we returned from the deep forest and crystal clean waters of the Boundary Waters. I told everyone who would listen. “I found where God lives.”  

The Divine had coordinated a wonderful adventure. It reconnected me to the powerful force of nature that felt a lot like my grandma’s love.

Setting in motion changes that would ripple through my life over a decade later. Reinvigorating my natural disposition and love of adventure. While Waking up a determination to maintain my connection to nature and water.

I finally found where I belong.

I knew I had found my home again.

Let the adventures begin!

My friend and I began to have many different experiences going into The Boundary Waters year after year.

Each of our journeys had lessons to share. And just like my grandma. None of them ever let me down.

Basswood lake reminded me I could keep myself warm and sheltered even with wet firewood and minimal supplies. Reminding me, my connection to nature provides powerful healing.

The portage to Four Town tested my determination. Showing me how strong I truly am inside and out. Teaching me that sometimes… less is more. While reminding me God has a great sense of humor.

And that the best conversations happen on rainy days over a cup of tea and under a tarp.

North Temperance was a reminder to soak up and enjoy sunny days! Because it’s not every day you get the chance to enjoy a ride on a lazy river of life. So, let yourself truly be present and enjoy them when you can.

The explorations of Big Lake and Brule Lake taught me that paddling through the big waves of life that come unexpectantly would be easier to navigate with a hand to hold.

South Hegman Lake was a lesson in being selective in the company I kept. Having good boundaries and carrying your own weight.  

Sawbill Lake taught me sometimes it’s best to rest and float through times of confusion and trust in divine timing.

I allowed myself to be grateful for each perfect synchronicity.  Not only in the Boundary Waters but in the flow of life I had finally gotten back into. These adventures in nature bringing me closer to the home within myself.

The vibes of the lakes changed with each adventure. Changing me as well.

My soul was patient as I slowly integrated the wisdom I gained by paddling, portaging and floating in the water. Navigating through the forests Turning into life lessons over the years long after the experience have passed.

All these experiences taught me to listen and apply the wisdom; I’ve earned the hard way.

Teaching me to trust in my abilities when I am swimming beyond my comfort zone.

Utilizing instincts and discernment to recognize when it is necessary to take action to retreat to safety.  And truly appreciating the times it’s safe to float.

The next year my friend cancelled last minute and could not go on our trip. By now I was so in love with these excursions that the need to return to nature let me conquer fears that kept me from growing.

So, my first solo pilgrimage into The Boundary Waters commenced.

Proving to myself I could make it through scary storms and long rainy days alone. While also reminding me that the right company is preferable.

As I got older, I tried less roughing it and more back floating. Realizing what I needed now was rest, and relaxation. To allow my overwhelmed nervous system to find respite.

This took me to beautiful Lake Kabetogama. Where I floated and sang to the water between naps.  

This somehow led to a magical experience on Mallard Island on Rainy Lake the very next year. Where I learned it was the right time to integrate all these experiences into a welcome transformation.

I kept flowing from one adventure to the next. Following the powerful pull of the water.

This time it was just me and my dog Hank on Poplar Lake off the Gunflint Trail.

A whole week of hiking deep into the forest, kayaking, and back floating at least 3 times a day. Even when the air temperature was colder than the lake. People passing by in a canoe wearing hoodies looking at me like I was a little crazy.

I’m as Minnesotan as a hearty tator tot hotdish and I know it. I waved and smiled. Now comfortable in who I am.

I floated until my fingers wrinkled. Unbothered by any judgement and owning my eccentric vibes.

Poplar Lake doesn’t know this, or maybe she does because I sang to her too.

The warm august water of Poplar Lake held me securely in the womb of her wisdom. While I floated and nurtured my broken heart and loved myself back to life.

These journeys into the forest and pristine waters of Northern Minnesota started to feel more like coming home than going away.

Fighting is futile at this point, my spirit knows it is the water calling my soul back home. I can no longer deny nor delay the journey.  I feel this powerful magnetic pull on my spirit as if I am being summoned.

Like my mom calling me in from free-ranging when the streetlights came on. It’s time to come home now.

The persistent pull and intuitive demands calling me home to the water are purposeful. There is a deep sacred duty inside. Compelling me to bring crucial environmental awareness to the world around me.

I believe it’s the spirit of water. She is asking me to help keep her safe as she has done for me. I know in my heart must answer.

Realizing I love the water as much as I love my grandmother. It’s a love so great that I was willing to change my life for the chance I might have an opportunity to protect it.

The Universe was urging me to utilize the life skills, and courage I gained on these journeys. Giving me the opportunity to run for State House of Representatives and then again for State Senate.

JUST to Save the Boundary Waters.

We must understand that the Garden of Eden we read about in a book. Is the planet we are living on right here and right now!

We are the stewards of the bountiful beautiful garden of Earth. The one God blessed us with that provides everything we need.

Did you know? The human body contains the same ratio of water as Planet Earth. A clever design that connects us profoundly to nature. We do not live on the Earth. We are of the Earth. Just like the birds, the bears and the whales.

Just like my body. When I nurture her and love her in healthy, kind ways. She provides me with all I need to thrive.

This is not a coincidence, it is a direct connection and symbolism of what will happen to the pristine water of Minnesota if we allow toxic copper mining near the Boundary Waters.

This type of mining has a 100% failure rate leading to catastrophic sulfuric acid pollution. This is forever pollution that lasts over 500 years. Sulfuric acid is basically battery acid that kills all it touches.

Water has no boundaries.

Minnesota is the water bearer of our Nation. Our beautiful land of 10,000 lakes holds over 20% of the entire worlds fresh water.

We cannot allow our public lands, pristine lakes, rivers and our drinking water to be sacrificed for any reason.

If the President gets his way, the pollution from copper mines will poison water sheds that flow into the Boundary waters up to Canada through the Rainy Lake watershed. Then Lake Superior connected to the chain of great lakes. Into Headwaters of the Mississippi River that runs through the heartland of our nation into the Gulf of Mexico.

The Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness is a rare and irreplaceable blessing.

Our very own garden of Eden must be treated as the sacred gift it is. The water it holds will be more valuable than gold in less than 25 years.

Environmental facts state that by 2050 over half the US will struggle to find clean drinking water.

Because I love the BWCA and water so much. I am compelled to bring awareness to the fact that Minnesota’s watery way of life is facing a death sentence.

Along with a very expensive and futile superfund cleanup to be covered by the taxpayers… thats you and me.

This isn’t an exaggeration. These are historically proven facts that to this day affect the land and residence of Butte Montana, Peru, Chile, South America and every single copper mining site that exists on the planet right now.

During the years I ignorantly denied my inner knowing I was going along just to get along…

This is when my life was dry and barren, harder in every possible way.

I feel as if the water and my grandma have been divinely guiding to my life’s purpose. To use my voice and art to advocate for the vulnerable and valuable environment that cannot defend itself. 

By applying the skills I’ve learned from the water and my grandma. Using gentle strength, devotion and unyielding persistence

This reminds me that.

The work… Is the prayer.

Now the inner knowing is profound and undeniable.

Compelling me to continue asking for help on my path to be of service for something bigger than myself.

I stand here. Using this generous opportunity to tell my story about finding home. And ask you for help too.

This is my earnest and urgent call to action. Please help me protect our water.  

To stand together and defend The Boundary Waters Canoe Area.

A gift of sanctuary, our garden of Eden, the place where God lives.

Where I finally… found home.

Blessings,

Emy Minzel

EmyMinzel.com

How to help Save the Boundary Waters!!!

Call your local Minnesota State Senators and Local State Representative in your district.

You can find out who they are by searching on the Minnesota Legislature website at www.leg.mn.gov

Or just follow this link and enter your zip code. Which will bring you straight there.

https://www.gis.lcc.mn.gov/iMaps/districts/

Contact all parties. Republican, Democrats, and independent representatives with respect and kindness.  Some of them are unaware of the dangers copper mining guarantees. I personally met with my Republican State Rep who was very responsive to my concerns. He loves Minnesota too! And meeting with him in person was impactful for both of us.

I believe most of the members in MN congress are good people who want to do the right thing. Not everyone can know everything and it’s up to us the voters to tell them how we want to be represented and what is important to us! Write a letter to the editor. Recruit friends and family here in Minnesota to get involved too. There truly is power in the people.

Here is what you say:

I am asking you to vote in favor of protecting The Boundary Waters by voting to support these three bills.

The Prove it First Bill                      Bad Actor Bill               Taxpayer Protection Act

SF1382 – State Senate                SF1744 – Senate               SF1383 – Senate

HF 954 – State House     HF 1197 – House     HF955 – House

The Prove it First Bill SF1382 /HF 954. Simply request that an applicant seeking a permit to operate a copper-sulfide mine must prove that such a mine can be operated and closed without causing pollution. Providing proof they have sites that have been in operation for 10 years and after being closed for 10 years without pollution.

Bad Actor Bill SF 1744 / HF 1197. This bill would prevent Minnesota from granting copper/sulfite mining permits to companies that have violated international laws, including corruption, bribery, or environmental destruction, ensuring Minnesota’s clean water remains protected from irresponsible international mining conglomerates.

Taxpayer Protection Act SF1383 / HF955. Taxpayer protection act would require nonferrous (non-iron) mining companies to fully fund any financial assurance package upfront and in cash. This would protect Minnesota taxpayers from being forced to pay for any environmental clean-up resulting from the nonferrous mining operations. Currently the regular operating methods of these companies are to leave a toxic mess and the cleanup bill to the taxpayers by simply declaring bankruptcy.  (Source: http://www.FriendsofTheBoundaryWaters.org)

Minnesota is the water bearer of the Nation that guards over 20% of the world’s fresh water. Fresh drinking water is a dwindling precious resource.

The EPA states that by 2050 over have of Americans will struggle to find fresh drinking water.

In less than 25 years the Nation is going to be facing severe water shortages.

This will be a true National Emergency!!!

With already over half of the water in Minnesota too polluted to drink or eat fish from. Protecting and preserving the water we need to survive is imperative. Voting to protect the Boundary Waters Canoe Area is part of our maintaining our States and National Security.

By voting in favor of these bills. You show your Minnesota residence that you stand up for us and do what is right. You prove that you stand against foreign corporations poisoning the purest water source in our nation in a shortsighted and reckless money grab. As your constituent I am asking you to protect our essential water resources and the Minnesota way of life. We can live without copper. We cannot live without water.

#BoundaryWatersCanoeArea, #bwcadventuresisters, #lessonsthroughjoy, #lifelessons, #naturelover, #signs, #spiritual

Pendulums and Magic

emyminzel

Like, an older sister, Stacy leads by example; and a great one at that. My Adventure Sister confidently dances to the beat of her own drum. She brings out the magic in most everyone she meets. I really love that about her! She’s inspired me to share mine with you too.

I had reservations about writing on pendulums and magic. Then this morning I saw a Grackle at the bird feeder. This is not a bird that shows up regularly at my house. So of course I looked it up.

According to the interwebs Grackle has multiple meanings, the ones that rang true to me where; When Grackle shows up it’s a sign of good fortune, and spiritual protection. YAY! Some Indigenous traditions call it the Firebird and believe it carries the power of a phoenix – which brings the message of rebirth and resurrection. Yay!????

 Since Grackles are known for their loud calls it’s a sign to courageously speak up for yourself. Be brave and speak your truth. It is my intention that sharing my stories of life lessons will somehow inspire others to see beauty even in the mishaps.

On the journey of life. I have constructed an eclectic spiritual belief system. Through trial and error and a dedicated practice of yogic principles. I’ve learned to trust my inner knowing. Mediation helps me to tune into the life force that animates the world. And helps me to pay attention to signs sent by the Universal Consciousness. I call it Higher Power, Spirit, Creation, or The Universe. Some call it God.

Yep. I worship the Earth; I think just maybe… Our planet is mankind’s community Garden of Eden. A gift we’ve been given to care for. It provides all we need to survive, stars, and aurora borealis to boot, it’s truly a miracle. Its ecological systems are so interconnected that not one event doesn’t influence another. (The Butterfly Effect)

How we act, treat each other, respect nature or not, absolutely comes full circle. I am a live and let live kind of girl. I believe thoughts become things, revealing our individual lived experiences. (What do you think about all day?!) And that Setting an intention is no different than praying.

I believe ‘magic’ is just being conscious of the energy I contribute to the web of life that connects it all together. By doing so I get to co-create with the energy of the cosmos, and the spiritual elements that surround us. There is no definition to my spiritual practice and there doesn’t have to be.

Either way, I think it’s important to accept that we all have different beliefs. While allowing others the freedoms to practice theirs, even if you don’t agree. In my opinion, it would be super cool if we all just followed the golden rule.

So, if I want to call on my inner earth worshipping sorceress I will!

Why not call on the healing element of water to help me flow with ease through the rocky rapids that pop up on my journey? Why not ask the wisdom of the wind to transport creative ideas into my awareness or carry my prayers to the Higher Power?

I know how to tap into the grounding stability of earth energy so I can sit down, focus and write about the thoughts I just asked for.  What if I called on the transformative energy of fire to transmute painful life experience into lessons through joy too? 

Maybe the Grackle/Fire bird was telling me to be brave enough to share my magical nature with others. So, they will feel free to do so too. It’s what Stacy did for me, and she made it so much fun! She exuded joyful confidence, which made me feel safe in doing the same. I love sharing stories of our magical friendship with you!

We started using Pendulums when planning our adventures in January. We would lay out the map and ask the pendulum to guide us where to go. I’d dangle it over an entry point number on the map, then watch what it says.

Sometimes it would just hang there and do nothing. That means move on. If it went counterclockwise, we took that as a sign it was not the place for us. When it started to circle Clockwise is a good indicator that was the entry point, we should plan for. We would even ask the pendulum which campsite was the best.

We are very earthy girls, feeling vibes, trusting signs, and when necessary, putting up boundaries. On the second BWCA adventure, we brought several pendulums. Each held colorful stones that signified the four directions North, South, East and West. With the intention to hang them from the trees to create an energetic circle of protection. When we arrived at camp the sun was high in the sky, so we used Stacy’s compass to identify the directions.

Thanking the trees for their assistance in holding the pendulums. We started in the North, the direction associated with the Earth element. Fertile and steady, earth is associated with the Goddess/Feminine energy. The stone hanging from the pendulum was made of green Jade. We thanked the spirit of the north for sharing nurturing guidance during our visit.

Circling clockwise we headed to the East to find a suitable station for the Pendulum associated with Air. We chose a white crystal quarts stone to represent prana, life force/breath. East and the element of air are associated with communication, wisdom, and intellect. We thanked them both for their assistance in carrying your intentions/prayers to Spirit.

Heading clockwise to the South we hung a pendulum made of a red stone to symbolize the element of fire. Fire has the masculine energy of the Sun. Connected to strong will and force. Fire is purifying. It creates and destroys, flames can heal and warm, or bring about new life by abolishing the old and worn. We thanked the spirit of the south and fire for the transformation that it would bring us.

Circling around to the West to hang a pendulum made of light blue stone. West is the direction associated with the element of Water. The healing nurturing womb of creation we all come from. Nothing can survive without water. Water is a feminine energy frequently associated with healing, cleansing, and purification, (holy water) it is correlated with flow of emotion.

To complete the circle of protection we continued clockwise to the North again to close the circle. We give thanks, and gratitude to the Universe for hearing our intentions of healing and protection. Protection against what we did not need to know… the forces that be, will surely take care of us now!

We did a second loop with a tiny sprinkle of black salt to solidify the intention of protection. And at that, our circle of protection was up and running. (Please take it easy with the salt if in nature, mother nature is not a big fan. It’s the intention, not the amount that counts.)

This is the campsite which housed us while we recovered from Billy Goat Portage. We had been so sore and eager to set up our camp that we had made another rookie mistake. One the circle of protection couldn’t protect us from experiencing. We had set up our tent on a semi flat clearing just at the base of a hill. The view was great, and it was in between the cooking grate and the pit potty trail.

We thought nothing of it as we set up cots under a tarp in a separate area of the very large campsite. The wind was picking up, and the night cooling down, so we went to bed early only to wake up a few hours later to 2-3” of rainwater in the bottom of our tent. Water drenched everything in it including us. I woke up very cold, and so exhausted I couldn’t think straight. I was already depleted from the adventures of the day. All I could do was sit on a cot hoping not to die in this misery.

Thankfully Stacy found me and knew exactly what to do to stop that from happening. Now you’re thinking that maybe our circle of protection didn’t protect us at all. But I believe it did. Having someone there who knew how to recognize hypothermia instead of diagnosing me as safe, just soggy suffering… did save me from getting very ill.

The circle of protection didn’t stop this from happening, but it did send me the help and support I needed. Not only with this experience but with the friendship Stacy and I have created. This makes me see that our circle of friends and family provide energetic and emotional protection as well.

The ones that see you suffering and come to your aid. Helping you in the way that they know best. Sometimes with expert nursing skills, other times sharing wisdom or a compassionate ear. These people, and sometimes even our beloved pets create your circle of protection in everyday life.

Sometimes when you call on the elements, they send you what you need, not what you want. Just like mother nature knows when it’s time to water her gardens and it happens to be on your wedding day. It all ends up okay. Some of the best conversations and laughs happen when it rains.

Like Jack Pines, which in my opinion are the coolest trees will only grow only after the seeds in its pinecone have been released by heat, usually a wildfire. Some people also need these kinds of interventions to support transformations. Nature is magical. Humans are encompassed in the natural world.

By realizing we have the ability to shift our energy/thoughts helps us take responsibility for the life force that resides in all of us. We had set the intention to stay safe. The Universe agreed but, in its intelligence, knew it was not going to let us skip out on the experiences that bonded our friendship with trust. Then got me to the gym. 😉

The beauty of Universal forces holds wisdom of divine timing. It orchestrates synchronistic events and meetings that deliver us to our destiny. Just like magic.

No pendulums needed.  

Sending big love and many blessings,

Emy Minzel

Heart Centered, Nature Lover, Writer, Advocate, Adventurer, Yogi, and so much more…

EmyMinzel.com

#BoundaryWatersCanoeArea, #bwcadventuresisters, #lessonsthroughjoy, #lifelessons, #naturelover, #spiritual

Billy Goat Trail Portage

emyminzel

Lessons Through JOY!

Chapter 8 ~

Authored by Emy Minzel

On the 2nd trip to the BWCA, Stacy and I had been calling in adventure! Excited by how transformational last year was. We were thrilled to go back for more lessons.  Craving excitement we spent a lot of time planning the next “Great Adventure into the Wilderness”.

This book is about lessons through joy; I can honestly say that this 2nd BWCA Adventure was not always joyful. I realize now that somewhere along the way. I had conditioned myself to believe the only way I learn a lesson was the “hard way”. Maybe this is why I was asking for hard games??? Silly girl.

This journey would help me rewire this programming… the hard way.

The second year we had packed a cooler with wheels. When we got to the outfitter, they told us wheels of any sort were not allowed in the BWCA.

He then said “It really won’t matter if you had wheels on that portage anyways. The trail is just too rough and uneven.”

Stacy and I looked at each other and asked, “how are we going to bring our food along?”

He said, “No problem, we have a pack for that.” Then disappeared into the back room. Coming back with a big army green soft sided backpack cooler. “If you want to keep it cold, I recommend you go across the street and get some dry ice too.”

That’s what we did. We came back with 6lbs of dry ice and proceeded to empty the contents of our roller cooler into the backpack cooler.

I had frozen water bottles because hot tea is sometimes not appetizing on a warm summer day. And lake water tastes like lake. I had chopped and packed a whole lot of veggies and a large container of watermelon, for hydration. 5lbs of potatoes, some orange juice, a box of wine and a whole lot of miscellaneous grocery items.

The people at the outfitters were kind of giving us the side eye. Looking at each other with their eyebrows up. Did they know we had no idea what we were getting ourselves into? Yes… yes, they did.

Yet we assured them. More than once mind you. That we knew it was going to several trips to portage, but we were ok with it.  (Insert hindsight facepalm here!) They politely let us carry on emptying our cooler into the insulated portage pack. Then went up to the bunk house to rest up for our 5am departure.

In the bunk house we shared the main quarters with a group of men. We had our own bunkbed bedroom as did they. They were very polite upon introduction. We went to bed early and they left. A few hours later they came back to the bunkhouse tipsy. One of the men hopped on the bunk located on the other side of the wall we shared. CREEEEEEEEAAAAAK!!!! EEEK!!! EEEK!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEAAAAK!!!

For the next 2 hours the bed creaked and squeaked each time he even blinked. He continued to perform the Olympic version of bunkbed fancy flip flop. A little-known bounce house boing and roll sleeping technique.  A method reminiscent of a rotisserie chicken style performed with panache and sound effects flair.

I lay there praying for him to fall asleep or at the very least, stop moving every 2 minutes for the sake of my sanity. “Ugh… my dude… It’s 2:30am now and we gotta be up in 90 minutes. For the love of Pete…. pleeeeeease sleep.”

I was about to lose my cool then finally he got tired of performing. At last, he got up and crawled into a different bunkbed that was not nearly as obnoxious. I slept lightly doing my best to get at least a little bit of rest. When the alarm went off at 4:00am we showered and packed up. Stepping out into the cool predawn morning at 4:45am closing the door behind us. I hope they got more sleep than we did that night.

Time to go! We were so stoked about this Adventure that nothing was going to get us down. We waited for the shuttle van at 5am, tea in our thermoses and a black bean brownie muffin my mom had made in our bellies. Excitement filled the air as we chatted with our driver Lawrence. He was also a guide and helped with BWCA rescues. He had lots of stories to share, we listened intently learning more about this ruggedly beautiful yet sometimes dangerous wilderness.

We pulled into the entry point. There is nothing better than being dropped off at 5:30am when the sun is coming up and hopping right into the canoe and on the calm lake kissed by the morning mist. That was not going to happen this time. The trip was going to start with a portage.

The driver pulled up the parking lot and pulled our supplies out of the trailer. Pointing down a tall grass lined path he declared. “The first portage out to the water is that way.”

“O.K! Thanks!” We tipped him and waved as he hopped back into the van to leave.

This Adventure we had planned was to include 6 or 7 portages. When the outfitter drops you off in the middle of nowhere, really your only option is to GO!

Car loaded with all the cargo we needed to portage.

By the time we got all our packs to the first water way, it had taken us 3 trips each. The 2 cots weighed 20 pounds apiece and the stuck out the opening on each side of one of the packs. We were able to team lift the food cooler pack on this trail while confirming this was going to be a long hard haul…

Still neither of us were discouraged. It was early morning, and we were bright eyed and roaring to go. We had planned on this hard work, claiming our comfort came first! We loaded up our freight into the canoe for the first time. Pushing it out to test float the balance it was nice and level. Though we were quite certain the canoe was at its weight capacity once we climbed in.

The first paddle to the second portage was very peaceful and picturesque. Reeds and wild grasses towered over our heads. The river way was very shallow; the water clean and clear enough to see little fish swimming all around. Occasionally a boulder barricade would imitate a speed bump and slow us down. We would have to hop out of the canoe standing on the giant rocks to carefully steer our cargo ship/canoe around them.

Just before the shallow river way opened to the lake. We came to a beaver dam. As we were crossing over it, I was standing on top, guiding the canoe and hurdling the strong structure.

Crossing my fingers and sending prayers that my foot wouldn’t fall through into to the beaver’s living room. The story my imagination made up was. After my foot poked through it roof. The upset beaver would then of course promptly chew my leg off, for breaking and entering!

Anyone else have a fun imagination too? Stacy giggled at the story I told while navigating over the sturdy den.

What a cool experience! This was already an adventure and we’ve only just begun!

The next leg of the journey was a peaceful 1-mile paddle on a long narrow lake. Intuitively paddling slowly to enjoy a beautiful sunrise service. There was mist at the edge of where the water meets the forest. The surface of the lake reflected diamond like sparkles courtesy of the orange sun guiding in a new day.

I tell people. “It’s where God lives.”  Because this is where I can feel spirit the most.

That morning felt as if ‘God’s country’ had a choir and was singing us a personalized sermon. We paddled silently absorbing this moment. It felt as if Creation herself showed up just to say. “Hello ladies! Welcome home.” I felt my soul let out an audible exhale of relief to finally be back.  

As we paddled on until we came another new experience. There were boulders under the canoe, and they were humongous! We would have to be very careful navigating slowly through them. At times having to both get out of the canoe. Stand on the boulders and push the canoe over or in between to pass.

My intuition told me the boulders were alive with sentience. The oldest beings of creation. I can’t help but believe that these Ancient Stone Spirits supported us on our journey.

At last, the water ran shallow, and we were at the 3rd portage. On the map it looks tiny, less than a quarter mile, totally no big deal. Trails on these maps are quiet deceiving. This was an obstacle course with steep inclines and even more steep drops going back down. The shoreline was made of extra-large jagged edged stones that shifted when you stepped on them. We had to navigate at this portage carefully so as not to twist an ankle. We could have easily gotten hurt trekking through this wobble stone agility test.  

We set to work bracing for another 3 portages each carrying something big and heavy. Stacy seemed to like to carry the canoe first. We concluded after the previous portage she couldn’t carry the canoe while I carried the food. Because the food pack was so heavy I needed assistance. When possible, to walk side by side, we would carry it together. That was a rare occasion this year.

Luckily for us the Gods up above were offering a little help. Just ahead there were a group of men coming back toward us going the opposite direction.

Deciding we better survey the situation before tackling the heavy baggage. We portaged the ‘lightest’ packs weighing no less than 50lbs and our oars. We hiked until we found water. The men we ran into had light gear like most do. Some of them made navigating this jagged optical course of impending broken bones look like it was a cake walk.

The oldest of the men sounded as if he had a southern accent and surveyed us quickly. “How are you ladies doing today?!”

“We are great and yourself?” I offered with a smile.

“Do you mind if we grab something and help you?” He replied. Without waiting for an answer, he hollered.  “Fellas! You guys run up a head and grab their thangs, help these lovely ladies out!”

Before we knew it, he had grabbed the canoe. The other hikers grabbed the rest of our comforts and “necessities”. Setting our packs on the wiggling rocks. Just far enough away from the canoe in the lake so they wouldn’t get wet.

Looking back, I wonder if they thought there was a dead body in that cooler pack. It was crazy heavy. We thanked them all profusely for their chivalry as they left us in their dust.

Already starting to get hungry and fatigued muscles. We celebrated our luck by being very grateful. Carrying each bag together trying not to trip the other or get hurt on the slanted, shuffling razor-edged rocks. Carefully we got the canoe loaded and shoved off to the next portion of the journey. Which seemed to come up in to time at all. Just a few minutes later we got to the 4th portage.

It was going to be the longest portage of the trip. I tried not to complain. After all, Stacy was carrying the canoe and heavy packs too! Neither of us was slacking in the portaging department. But when we pulled up and saw a staircase of rocks going 40 feet up at a steep angle. I tried to fend off a mild panic attack.

My inner child wanted to stomp and throw a fit. “I don’t wanna and you can’t make me.”

We decided this would be a good time to take a break resting and eating more breakfast muffins. We needed to refuel and rehydrate. It was now late morning, and the day was warming up. After our “2nd breakfast” we weren’t going to dilly dally we had places to go. Fairy Lake was waiting for us!

We put the lightest portage packs on and headed up the stone staircase to investigate the long portage. Follow the winding narrow path upwards. “I’m already beginning to feel the burn.” I commented.

Stacy was just ahead of me and was starting to feel some fatigue too. “Mind over matter, we can do this, we ARE doing this.” She said over her shoulder.

“Right!” I said.

This path was paved with haphazard stones jutting out at random. Seemingly at just the right spacing so that you couldn’t keep a steady pace. I had to be fully present. Observing where to put each foot next so I didn’t trip. Adding to the atmosphere there was a steep drop off descending down the mountain we were climbing. Only a foot or so off the path.

Keeping my gaze down and my focus on my red water sandals. I tried to take brief looks at the geographical beauty around us. We didn’t talk much because we had to focus. This trail seemed to keep going up, then we would have to go down to go back up again. Even with our lightest packs this portage was long and hard as hell!

Just when you think the end of the lane is just ahead. Low and behold it is only an illusion my friend. We had to keep going. Up and down. Then up and down some more. Dodging low hanging branches snagged our full-size fishing pole lines that stuck out of one of the packs. We had large cots sticking out each side one portage pack. We came to a narrow corridor stone mountain face on each side. Cots bashing into the stone back and forth with each step as we made our way through. I laugh out loud at this memory. (Insert yet another facepalm moment!)

About 30 minutes later we see water! “Yay! We made it!” Stacy celebrated our achievement as we set our first load down. We gave each other a high five and turned around empty handed to grab another load of baggage.

This time we took in the scenery a little more, unencumbered by the weight of our necessities. I really enjoyed the jaunts back, although we still had to be diligent and very careful with our footing. This trail was tricky, and at times very scary.

Ugh… Here we were at the beginning already. Our pile of stuff still looking extremely heavy. When we started that morning Stacy estimated that the cooler pack weighed at least 100lbs!

It took two of us to lift it onto a tall rock. When it was elevated enough, I could crouch down to slip my arms into the straps. Slowly I stood lifting its weight my back, buckling the waist strap around my middle for more support. I had to walk slowly and bent over while carrying it. It never even crossed our minds when packing that one person would have to carry this load. We were the Queens of teamwork.

I am 5 feet nothin’ and at this exact time in my life, I was not “in shape”. I was carrying well over half my body weight on my back. At least the cooler never complained when I fell over or had to drop it. Saying a prayer to Mercury the God of transportation for swift movements. Maybe Pan the Goat God of the forest would bless me with graceful footing. Praying for help as I ascended the staircase again.

“Goodness sakes! Stace, I’m going to need some help.” I exclaimed, trying not to panic.

We had only just begun, and I was falling backward, forwards and sideways from the burdensome weight on my back. I thought my legs were burning before! Ha!

I felt clumsy trying to gain control of this unyielding bulk on my body. Many, many times Stacy had to push up on the pack from behind, so I made it up the pathway. If she would accidentally help too much, I would easily fall over in random direction.

“What have we gotten ourselves into?!” I asked, only a short way into the trek. “Would you like me to try to carry it?” Stacy offered.

I tried to reassure us both. “No, I got it.” I said.  While simultaneously falling over and almost down the side of the mountain. This was a scary moment for both of us!

Reacting quickly and saving me from what would surely be a painful steep tumble. Stacy grabbed the pack with all her strength, pulling me back to the safety of the trail.

Muscle fatigue had set in challenging my whole body, my legs wanted to give out. I truly had not been physically nor mentally prepared for what we were doing.

I was embarrassed about falling and then I got mad. I thought to myself. “You can and you will do this.” And with a little help from my friend, I did. My thoughts changed from being annoyed, that I had to watch my footing so intently. To considering it was a blessing. For it gave me something to think of besides this beastly burden on my back.

Many thoughts ran through my head, as we journeyed up, up, up, down, up, down. Sometimes falling up the boulders I was trying to climb. This trail experience happened to me for a reason. I contemplated why as we hiked in silence.

Clearly the Universe was telling me to keep focus on what was right in front of me. If you look too far ahead, I get distracted, look too far ahead, I will lose focus, fall off the path. It sounded right at the time. As I was concerned about having to restart my business after moving to another city just a few months before.

This was not the complete life lesson taught by Billy goat Portage. But learning to keep my focus and continue putting one foot in front of the other; has been a repeat lesson over the years.

At last reached the end of Billy Goat Trail. Whew! Finding a taller boulder, I sat it down and unbuckled the cooler pack with a sign of relief. I felt 100 pounds lighter. After a short pause for a water break, we headed back for our last portage pack and the canoe. I was afraid if I sat down, I wouldn’t get back up to continue on.

“Let’s DO this!” I said as we headed UP the path for the final fourth lap. This time it felt much easier than the first two trips.

I never in my life have done something as adventurous, that dangerous, or that physically challenging. Pushing myself to the point of exhaustion, muscles shaking with fatigue… I had very much proven to myself what I was capable of. I was far from the pillar of health at this time. Billy Goat Portage was the initiation I needed. It led to the desire to reclaim my health. It showed me how capable I truly was.  

 After this death-defying feat, we still had another 4-mile paddle to get to our next destination. We paddled those 4 miles taking our sweet time, staying close to shore on the large lake. We finally reached the cove in which our next portage was supposed to be. We paddled back and forth for almost an hour, even shoring up the canoe to climb a hill in search of this mysterious missing portage. Which we couldn’t find the entry point for the life of us!

After a while we concluded we were both too fatigued to go on anyways. It would be best to find a place to camp before we both expired from exhaustion. We found an open campsite almost immediately. It was the large “5 star” rated campsite the Guide at the outfitter told us about last night. We had dismissed his suggestion because we had plans to keep going. Was that coincidence? I think not.

As soon as we saw the campsite a wave of relief flooded my nervous system. We were so very sore from that journey and needed to be done for the day. Our bodies needed nourishment and nurturing. After eating we decided to soak our aching muscles in the lake to cool them down. The lake was cold, but I have no doubt in mind that if we were to opt out of some cold-water hydrotherapy; I would not have been able to move for the whole entire week.

In the end we got the adventure we were calling in that year! Although it didn’t come in a way we expected it. The definition of adventure says there must be elements of danger in the experience to be called an ‘adventure’.

I’d say hurdling a beaver dam and navigating an obstacle course made of razor-sharp shifting rocks. Experiencing Billy goat portage 4 times and almost falling down a mountain side wearing a 100-pound backpack. Then waking up in the middle of the night soaking wet in a flooded tent and on the brink of hypothermia would qualify for danger. Don’t you?

Yet, without this challenge I would have never started my journey back to wellness. Something had changed deep inside me after that. I realized I was not doing my body any favors by going so easy on myself. My muscles were weak, my balance off, and my joints achy. We had spent our whole BWCA vacation resting and recuperating our battered bodies, preparing for the return journey.

After we got home; instead of going back to my old routine consisting of an abundance of couch and TV time. I started using my gym membership, challenging myself physically for the entire next year. Instead of TV I started to write. I consistently challenging myself, leveling up in life and on the elliptical. This led to jogging on the treadmill. Which turned to running and then weight training.

I was determined to prepare myself for the 2015 BWCA trip. I wasn’t going to be caught off guard again, no Siree!

As I write this. We just returned home from the 2015 BWCA adventure about a week ago. Where I learned the Universe has a wonderful sense of humor. Because this year; we didn’t portage. Not even once.

This lesson taught me how strong I really was. How capable I am when I truly focused. Gaining the desire and determination to maintain wellness has been a blessing in many ways.

This experience started the journey to a healthier version of me. The me I want to be. I want to be active and able to do all the adventuring I desire as I get older. Staying strong and fit is a necessary component to making that possible. Especially as I age.

Over the years I have completed 500hours of yoga training and I am a Certified Yoga Teacher. My thoughts on exercise have transformed to gratitude. I love to be active; I love moving my body, and I am grateful for all it can do. I am always thanking my body for what it does for me. “Thank you, body for doing what I ask you to do. Today and every day. I appreciate you.”

I thank myself for the will and focus to continue moving in healthy ways. After all, my subconscious can hear me. And I am purposely reprogramming my beliefs and requesting easier games now!

Although this was a lesson that felt like it was taught “the hard way”. I now know it was a gift of realignment back to wellness. Which brings me gratitude and great joy!

Wishing you big love and many blessings,

Emy Minzel

Heart Centered, Nature Lover, Writer, Advocate, Adventurer, Yogi, and so much more…

EmyMinzel.com

BWCA
#BoundaryWatersCanoeArea, #bwcadventuresisters, #lessonsthroughjoy, #lifelessons, #signs, #spiritual

Lake water tea with a swimming Moose

emyminzel

Lessons through JOY!

Chapter 6 ~ by Emy Minzel

Early one morning on our first Boundary Waters Canoe Area adventure. We were sitting on the boulder beach in our camp chairs having tea. I highly recommend bringing tea and honey if you are going to be drinking the BWCA lake water. The water is safe to drink after you boil it. Although it is pristine, it still has a lake flavor. Tea helps cover the taste quite well.

Tea is a lovely analogy to portray the lessons of our adventures. Stacy and I decided to challenge ourselves. By venturing into metaphorical ‘hot water’ situations. We showed ourselves and each other what we are made of. We recognized our tenacity, our will to succeed, encouraging each other to be authentically ourselves the whole way.

We enjoy supporting each other’s skills and differences. Like tea, we had let our best selves steep and flow in these challenges. We allowed the delicious blend of personality and talent to brew into cup fulling spiritual experiences. Which has allowed for this fairly new friendship to grow into a loving sisterhood over time.

So here we were vibing, observing nature like it’s our favorite TV program. Engrossed in a morning meditation of allowing stillness. The music of nature soothed our spirits and calmed the nervous system.

We heard beautiful birds’ songs, occasional beaver splashing or fish jumping, a faint comforting roar from the small waterfall just south of our campsite. This is what I miss most when I leave; the sound of pure uninterrupted nature; the sound of peace.

We were enjoying the moment of being one with nature when I spotted a giant animal swimming in the lake. It was moving fast! I ran to get my binoculars and zoomed in closer. Even with binoculars it was hard to be sure what it was. It looked like two huge rabbit ears flowing quickly through the water.

 “What is that?!” I asked Stacy and handed her the binoculars.

She looked and shrugged, unable to decipher. We had to wait until it got closer.

“It looks like a cow or something… oh! It’s a moose! Do moose swim?!” She handed me the binoculars back to validate her findings.

Now that it was closer I saw that it was a moose. Clearly, they DO swim. Turns out they are exceptionally good swimmers as she was demonstrating! The moose was moving swiftly for such a large animal.

“How cool is that!” I grinned wide as Stacy. I was impressed and psyched to have seen a swimming moose in real life.

“Let’s go get the Animal Spirit Guide, book! To see what message the moose is sending us!” Stacy said as she got up to grab it out of the tent.

Stacy and I believe that The Universe or God/Spirit, insert whatever you prefer to call a higher power. We believe it sends us messages all the time if we are present enough to see them and listen. For instance. Often observing an animal, you don’t see every day is a sign/message from the heavens just for you! We wanted to know what messages the moose was delivering this morning.

We looked up Moose in the Animal Spirit Guide, book by Steven D. Farmer, Ph.D. It said. ‘If a Moose shows up, it means you should feel proud of your recent accomplishment and share them eagerly, not to be arrogant, do it for the humble joy of sharing. It’s important to encourage others with their dreams and vision and by supporting their triumphs.’

In this book it also gives ideas to talk to the moose spirit when you are feeling extremely self-critical and need to remind yourself of your good qualities. There were more meanings in the book, but these are the ones that rang true to me at this time.

That’s how intuition works, when you receive a sign and investigate the meanings, some information won’t resonate, and some will. Use discernment to keep the things that ring true and dismiss what doesn’t. The Universe doesn’t have actual words, so you have to decipher it.

All the messages the moose had to share were comforting and confirming. I WAS very proud of myself for getting off the couch and out of my comfort zone for this trip. I have always loved nature but had fallen into the daily grind of life, like ground hog day repeating itself. I had lost touch with the true purpose of living life.  

From my previous chapter on canoe tipping and the portage to nowhere. The message ‘not to be arrogant’ had just been confirmed. Don’t arrogantly ask the Universe hard games… you’ll get them! Take it easy, share joy. Share your accomplishments with humble encouragement. This is exactly the main intention of writing this book and sharing our stories.

The moose hit the nail on the head with excessively self-critical thoughts. I am 4’ 11  1/2 ” and I had gained more weight than I preferred at the time. It was time to care for myself with kindness. (This lesson has taken me too long to fully incorporate and that’s another book all in itself!)

It was time for me to acknowledge that if I don’t love and care for myself, how can I expect anyone else to love me or treat me better than I treated me?  I was the one setting the standard here.

Stacy and I processed this message together as we drank more tea.

She commented. “This is so true! I would never allow someone to talk to me the way I talk to myself at times… Would, you allow someone to treat you the way YOU treat you somedays?”

Referring to how our inner dialogue is not always kind, especially for ourselves. I know that I am very critical of me. Yet, if someone talked to me the way I was talking to myself. Saying the judgmental harsh commentary running in my head out loud. I would think “those are fighting words”.

We talked about how we are very hard on ourselves and sometimes other people too. The conversation led to being judgmental of women and judged by them as well. How we need to lift each other up and encourage women to stand together.

We wished that we could all see that we do not have to be in competition. That we all have unique skills and talents that if we cooperated would make magic. Strong confident women that know there is enough success for all of us to go around.

Putting each other down, talking smack about how someone looks in those pants, or “OMG can you believe they just did that?!” This kind of energy isn’t helping anyone. We can unlearn this behavior.

What I have learned is gossiping about others doesn’t make you feel better. What it does is show others you can’t be trusted and will do the same to them.

How is this any different if we are commenting on ourselves? Our subconscious and self-esteem hear our inner dialogue. Our subconscious thoughts form our habits and beliefs! Ope.

I believe most of us do the best we can in the time and circumstances we are in. Including me! I have learned that ‘an eye for an eye’ leaves the whole world blind. Unable to see all the love and support that can be found beyond that relationship.

What if we just observed when we are judging or are being hard on ourselves or others? Then asked ourselves more questions to process and release those negative thoughts.

Would I give others in my situation more compassion than I am allowing for myself? If so, why?

What would I say to my best friends going through this same thing? What if I allowed myself the same grace? How would that change the way I feel about it?

Life is hard enough as it is. I’ve learned the energy I put out in the Universe is what is going to come back to me. What do I want to be returned? If you want others to support you with love and loyalty, do the same for them.

Girl Power is a real live energy! I’ve learned to embrace the power in divine feminine co-creation. I find joy being around the energy of the wonderful women in my life. They have a nurturing vibe, full open hearts, and share their stories of wisdom that lift my spirit and fill my cup.

The solution I came to, is treat myself like I treat my best friends. If necessary, I will deflect my own mean judgements or stories that bring me down. I will do better to be kind to me.

Words have power. That’s why they call it ‘spelling’. What energy are you sending when speaking or thinking of yourself or others?

Learning that my thoughts become things. Being more kind and encouraging, learning to be humble in all areas of my life. These lessons have all rolled together into a massive personal transformation over the years.

Digging deep into the divine guidance being delivered. Contemplating the unpleasantness of some of these lessons learned through relationships, careers, actions, consequences of paths taken. Seeing them as ‘life lessons’ and learning opportunities instead of things that just happened to me.

This has helped me become more the me I want to be. The me that does the inner work of transmuting failures into wisdom. Trauma into tenderness.

While I did not come up with this revolution at the exact Moose viewing moment. It has led to where I am today. These BWCA adventures kickstarted a revolution of my whole life for the better. I get to decide what it means to be “better” nobody else. Same goes for you.

I’ve learned it’s self-love when I allow myself to walk away from connections that do not value and respect me. These were the hardest lessons to learn. Not easy or joyful at all. I am healing by loving myself enough to stop allowing that behavior. Especially from myself.

In the long run I had to learn from taking those emotional hits. I knew I had to find the lesson and transform them into wisdom. It’s taught me to forgive myself for putting up with unkindness. Even realizing I had to forgive myself for the negative things I told and believed about myself. I saw that I can forgive others as it was their part in teaching this lesson as well.

From the lessons guided by the animal spirits that show up for me repeatedly. The spiral of life seems to keep me coming back around to acknowledge these teachings even more deeply year after year. A persistent continuing education of life curriculums.

Watching that moose swim across the lake was a cool experience!  I will cherish the memory and the message. I feel that way about all our BWCA trips. At times words fall short of accurately describing the changes that have occurred in my mind, my body and spirit. It’s difficult to truly capture the depth of my internal changes.

Taking time for introspection inspired me to share these stories of our experiences. Contributing to a new perspective on how I was going through life. I feel my soul is soothed by seeing that all these experiences do make sense years later in the journey of my life.

I don’t know what the future brings. What I do know. History has shown me that I can trust the path. I have every intention of enjoying that feeling of faith in each phase of my life. These stories have proven to me that everything is always working out as it should.

So, I will continue to follow the signs and trust my inner knowing. As long as I remember to ask the Universe for easier life experiences full of joyful adventures, supportive kind connections and love!

With much love,

Emy Minzel

Heart Centered, Nature Lover, Writer, Advocate, Adventurer, Yogi, and so much more…

EmyMinzel.com