Tag: #dobetter

Self-Reflection lesson ~

emyminzel

Ugh, you know those moments that you make mistakes, and you recognize them immediately yet too late to change them? I hate that! However, sometimes, these moments are even more teachable because we’ve learned the hard way. I was out and about with my friend as we were visiting local businesses looking for donations for an upcoming community event we were working on.

We had pulled into the driveway of a business that raises birds for hunting-dog training and food. We had just turned in the long driveway to see a loose pheasant with blinders on. It had escaped and was wandering around free without being able to see. I immediately hopped out of the car and scooped it up so we could return it to safety. This sinking feeling came over me as we pulled up to the office to return the bird back to the farm.

I knew nothing good was going to happen to this poor little guy, but I did it anyway. Man, I am kicking myself in the butt for this. Sometimes doing the right thing means doing the wrong thing. I believe I should have saved this little bird from impending doom instead of delivering it back to its captures. The feeling of guilt was overwhelming as I handed the bird back. Telling myself this is what I am ‘supposed to do.’

Sad pheasant face

If I had it to do over again, I would have made a different choice. I would have brought this bird home and cared for it myself or brought it to the wildlife rehabilitation center if necessary.  Days later, the thoughts and feelings of my actions still are with me. Oh, how I wish I would have done this differently. How many times in our lives do we do have situations like this come across our path? I think more than we admit or care to count.

Learning lessons the hard way is not my favorite, I prefer to learn my lessons through Joy! I am sure most people are the same way, but this is not how life goes, is it? All we can do is forgive ourselves for our mistakes and vow not to repeat them. I believe the Universe/God puts these experiences in front of us in a way that will stick with us for growing purposes.

This bird was vulnerable but trusting enough to let me pick it up because it could not see me. In turn, I violated its trust instead of taking responsibility for its life and safety. Did I take the easy way out? I mean really, what do I know about raising a pheasant? Would I be able to keep it safe and happy, or do I just think I could? Technically taking the bird would be stealing.

Or, if you are an animal rights supporter like I am, I don’t look at it that way. From a moral standpoint, I let myself and this bird down. I know this because I can feel it in my soul. This blog post is not joyous or uplifting, but hey, we all have days like that. We all have lessons we learn the hard way. I am sharing mine with you to let you know you are not alone. Next time we will do it; differently, next time we will do better.

Later that day, I helped relocate and rescue dozens of Monarch caterpillars onto their milkweed food source. Did you know milkweed is the ONLY food for Monarchs? Hopefully, we saved the lives of these endangered beauties by giving them a helping hand. Doing so helped me feel like I redeemed my actions of returning the bird, but only just a little. I reminded myself today that sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.

milkweed

Thanks for reading my blog today. I hope that sharing my hard-earned experiences helps you to learn more of your lessons through JOY!

 

Sending joy and blessings to you,

Love, Emy Minzel

Visit me at:

EmyMinzel.com

EmyMinzel.AdventureSister@gmail.com

@EmyMinzel

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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

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Photos by: Deb Sorenson

2018 Review!

emyminzel

What are you proud of and what could you do better?

If I were to make an adult report card about life, I feel like there are major courses we all have in common. Each of these life courses may demand more time than others at times, so they cannot always be as equal as we would like them to be. Balance is good thing, but when life hands us assignments, it’s not always in manageable bite size pieces.

This year I wanted to grade myself on my personal performance in 2018. Then use it as a guide going into 2019 so that I know where I need to focus my attention. Here are the courses of life in which I am going to grade myself and do my best to be realistic yet kind; so that I don’t romanticize areas in which I can improve.

2018 Report Card

Family Relationships = B

Marriage/Love = C+

Career & Money = C-

Health & PE = F

Passions & Hobbies = B

Family 2018 – I believe that relationships with my closest family members have improved this year. We all have grown on personal levels and learned to accept and respect each other for who we are. Yet there is always room for improvement. We could be closer, and I would like to work more towards that going forward.

Family 2019 Goals – Spend more time with my mom, daughter and extended family. This summer has been crazy busy, and I did not get to spend as much time as I would have liked to with my favorites. To rectify this, I’d like to plan some girl dates and outings that support team work and relationship building.

Marriage/Love 2018 – I put marriage in its own category because I believe it is a separate relationship that takes much more tending to. 2018 has been a major year of transformation and growth for my marriage. I admit that not all of it was as perfect as the pictures I post on Facebook. To be honest, we had a very trying year. Yet by the end of 2018 we are better than we had been all year. We made it through the growing pains, we got stronger and our marriage muscles improved from this struggle. We both have sincerely thanked each other for the life lessons we seem to have given during the past year.

Marriage 2019 Goals – We hope to use those lessons as stepping stones. I am thankful for our love and communication skills that helped us through really trying months. I will not take my husband’s love, support and loyalty for granted. I realize that there are ways I can improve my part of the relationship. Like not blaming him for things we both have a part in creating. Again, I must work on myself by managing my time, emotions and expectations to better benefit our relationship.

Career & Money 2018 – Like the teacher who is hard on you because they know you can do better, I’m going to be very tough on myself in this area because I feel like I need to be. Although I have worked harder this past year than I ever have in my life! My bank account does not reflect a smidgen of the effort I extended, and this is not okay with me. In a world that sees success as dollar signs; I know that I need money to accomplish the things I want to. I’ve got Adventures to go on gosh darn it!

I am doing my best and working hard to make a career by following my heart and passions. While reality is that my real-life needs are not being met by doing so. This current situation frustrates me beyond words because I love being a Massage Therapist. I love helping others feel better in their own skin.

Owning your own business is not easy. It’s taken me eight years to build my practice and gain clients to be financially successful… and only one summer to feel like I hit a massive recession. Currently my career is not supporting the lifestyle I wish to live. Now and it’s up to me to decide what I am going to do about it besides complain. I’ve got to get back to good in this course!

Career & Money 2019 Goals – I just don’t know how to justify doing what feels good and following my heart; when it does not support my other human needs and wants. I am hoping the Universe/God sends me some signs of relief soon. That being said; I am very proud of myself for overcoming my fears and taking the chances I did.

I used every single ounce of courage I had to run for State Representative so that I could affect the change I wished to see in my government and community. I lost the election, but I learned a great deal and had a magnificent life experience. I am proud of myself for that. Yet, doing so had a negative effect on my income and career that I did not anticipate.

If I choose to run again, I will now have the experience and knowledge of what to expect, which should help me prepare.

Health & PE 2018 – Although I lost weight in 2018, I know I failed health class. I will not candy coat it in anyway because I would be lying. I had an adventurous and fun yet, very stressful year, that had me reaching out for the comfort of all my bad habits I had thought I was over. I started smoking again, I was not eating nutritious foods and basically lived off wine and pizza. I was not exercising except when I was out door knocking or in a parade.

It was the stress and anxiety that helped me lose the weight. Yet during the short time between the election in November and ringing in the New Year, I have put every single pound back on. I was seeking consolation through food and eating my feelings. Not healthy and I know it. Time to regroup and recoup.

Last, but not least. I learned that I have a strong tendency to fall back into old habits.

Health & PE Goals 2019 – This year I will focus on losing the weight in a healthy way. Giving my body what it needs to be its best. Utilizing nutrition and exercise will be my number one goal for healthy living. I will give my body the proper nutrition it needs with whole foods and stop feeding it sugar and pizza!

I need to love myself enough to say no to things that insult my body, mind and spirit. I must love myself enough to make decision and choices that heal, not harm my body. I know better, I must do better.I have resolved to manage my stress with exercise instead of the brain changing chemicals of smoking. (So far, so good!)

From what I remember, I used to like to exercise! Dance parties in the kitchen are back into my routine and squats while I fold laundry are now on the schedule most every day. I have a goal to start running again too! I am ready for this change.

Passions & Hobbies 2018 – Although this year was plum full of goal setting, and dream chasing I feel like I had a really hard time with balancing it all into life. I gave myself a B, because I had a very adventurous year doing things, I never dreamed I would do.

Yet, I still did not do much of the things that bring me to balance. Like camping in the Boundary Waters Canoe Area or kayaking and spending time on the water. I justified this by saying if I didn’t run for office, I may not have the BWCA to escape to in the future. When I should have made time to go because that is where I feel my connection to spirit the most. After all, it was my passion for the environment that led me to running for office.

In 2018 Stacy and I submitted our book proposals three different times and where unsuccessful. I will not let this dishearten my resolve but will work harder to get better so that we will succeed.

Passion & Hobbies 2019 Goals –

I allowed the demands of my time to pull me from my spiritual path at times. I now see I need those time outs to center my soul and listen to my inner guidance. Being realistic with the timeline of achievements will benefit my state of mind too.

Adventure Sister Stacy and I know that 2019 will lead to another book to add to our Trilogy and are excited to get to work on it!

I’d like to work on my public speaking ability in 2019 also. It is an area in which I would like to improve for the sake of my own personal growth. In 2018 I learned that facing my fears is difficult, but the reward is worth it.

I am extremely proud of my courage, tenacity, persistence and dedication I showed I am capable of in 2018. There are many areas in which I see I can improve, like working on my closest relationships that took the back burner as I chased my dreams. I have learned the value my time and the importance of balancing it.

Comments:

Look at that! I have not only grown older but maybe even a little wiser! 2018 has been full of lessons and growth that have led to setting more goals. Self-improvement is something I work on every day. Working on ourselves is important so that we don’t blame others for situations in our lives. It helps us take responsibility for where we are, where we are going, how we are going to get there and who we are while we are there.

You cannot change others, you can only change yourself!

I tend to look on the bright side of things, so I had to be tough on myself in this report card. As you can see 2018 GPA has some room for improvement! My hopes are that these grades will serve as a tool to continue my own personal growth. I can’t wait to see this report card come up in my timeline over the next years to compare!

When we put our pro’s and con’s down on paper its easier to see how far we’ve come in one year and how far we have yet to go!

What lessons have you learned during 2018?! I’d love to hear how you’ve grown!

May your 2019 be full of blessings and Lessons through Joy!

With love,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@EmyMinzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.com

When you know better,

emyminzel

I don’t let my emotions get to me like they used to. I have learned to give people the benefit of the doubt and see the good in others as often as possible. Even the ones that don’t seem so ‘good’ I remind myself we do not know what others are dealing with in their lives, be kind.

I choose to think that people who challenge us often just need more love and patience. Then there are days when life sends a character to cross your path that makes you think maybe you were wrong. Are all people truly good at heart? Are they really doing the best that they can in the time and space that they are given?

I will not lie and say I have never done anything wrong or done something that hurt others. I have. I am human. I am not proud of those moments and choose to learn from those mistakes and the feelings of disappointment in myself. When this happens, I vow to do better next time. I think most people do the same.

Like Maya Angelou say’s “When you know better, you do better.”

I believe this with my whole heart. What baffles me are people to continue to hurt people after they know better or have been hurt themselves. People of authority abusing their power to get what they want knowing full well that it is not benefitting the greater good choose to do it anyway. They choose not to learn lessons offered to them.

The people who choose to point fingers instead of take responsibility are not people I respect or look up to. It is a shame that we often find people like this in positions of authority who often abuse that power. This is the whole premise behind the #MeToo movement and behind all racism in our County. Abuse of power ticks me off.

Since I was a young girl I have learned to believe that your age, career or title do not give you any special privileges to treat people like crap. I just don’t buy it. I treat the President of a Bank the same way I treat the kid who helps me bag my groceries. If you are jerk well, I could mirror that right back at ya babe… but now I just choose to walk away from conflict. I stand stong and comfortable in my calm.

I have come to terms with my ‘shadow side’ the side that won’t let people treat me with disrespect. The side that helps me set healthy boundaries in my relationships and in life. These feelings of anger or discomfort have a purpose in our lives and should not be shoved down. We mustn’t be led by these negative emotions but allow them to speak to us and help us discern the truth of our situation.

Being able to listen to our instinctual emotional reflexes to others and situations is a blessing. We are giving these feelings as gifts to help us navigate life. Just because we feel anger, rage or disappointment does not mean our lives are consumed by these emotions. We have the ability to move through our emotions follow our hearts to a brighter tomorrow.

How we choose to navigate our gifts is up to us. When you know better, you do better. I believe this is true for most people. I choose to embrace the light and the dark side of our human duality, we were given these gifts for a reason. How you choose to use them is up to you, and the legacy you wish to leave.

Wishing you an abundance of blessings,

Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Follow the Adventure Sisters on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/BWCAdventureSisters

Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister

https://stacycrep.comhis