#dobetter – Emy Minzel

Ugh, you know those moments that you make mistakes, and you recognize them immediately yet too late to change them? I hate that! However, sometimes, these moments are even more teachable because we’ve learned the hard way. I was out and about with my friend as we were visiting local businesses looking for donations for an upcoming community event we were working on.

We had pulled into the driveway of a business that raises birds for hunting-dog training and food. We had just turned in the long driveway to see a loose pheasant with blinders on. It had escaped and was wandering around free without being able to see. I immediately hopped out of the car and scooped it up so we could return it to safety. This sinking feeling came over me as we pulled up to the office to return the bird back to the farm.

I knew nothing good was going to happen to this poor little guy, but I did it anyway. Man, I am kicking myself in the butt for this. Sometimes doing the right thing means doing the wrong thing. I believe I should have saved this little bird from impending doom instead of delivering it back to its captures. The feeling of guilt was overwhelming as I handed the bird back. Telling myself this is what I am ‘supposed to do.’

If I had it to do over again, I would have made a different choice. I would have brought this bird home and cared for it myself or brought it to the wildlife rehabilitation center if necessary. Days later, the thoughts and feelings of my actions still are with me. Oh, how I wish I would have done this differently. How many times in our lives do we do have situations like this come across our path? I think more than we admit or care to count.

Learning lessons the hard way is not my favorite, I prefer to learn my lessons through Joy! I am sure most people are the same way, but this is not how life goes, is it? All we can do is forgive ourselves for our mistakes and vow not to repeat them. I believe the Universe/God puts these experiences in front of us in a way that will stick with us for growing purposes.

This bird was vulnerable but trusting enough to let me pick it up because it could not see me. In turn, I violated its trust instead of taking responsibility for its life and safety. Did I take the easy way out? I mean really, what do I know about raising a pheasant? Would I be able to keep it safe and happy, or do I just think I could? Technically taking the bird would be stealing.

Or, if you are an animal rights supporter like I am, I don’t look at it that way. From a moral standpoint, I let myself and this bird down. I know this because I can feel it in my soul. This blog post is not joyous or uplifting, but hey, we all have days like that. We all have lessons we learn the hard way. I am sharing mine with you to let you know you are not alone. Next time we will do it; differently, next time we will do better.

Later that day, I helped relocate and rescue dozens of Monarch caterpillars onto their milkweed food source. Did you know milkweed is the ONLY food for Monarchs? Hopefully, we saved the lives of these endangered beauties by giving them a helping hand. Doing so helped me feel like I redeemed my actions of returning the bird, but only just a little. I reminded myself today that sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.

Thanks for reading my blog today. I hope that sharing my hard-earned experiences helps you to learn more of your lessons through JOY!

Sending joy and blessings to you,

Love, Emy Minzel

Visit me at:

EmyMinzel.com

EmyMinzel.AdventureSister@gmail.com

@EmyMinzel

Photos by: Deb Sorenson

It took time to learned to give people the benefit of the doubt and see the good in others as often as possible. Even the ones that don’t seem so ‘good’ I remind myself we do not know what others are dealing with in their lives, be kind.

I choose to think that people who challenge us often just need more love and patience. Then there are days when life sends a character to cross your path that makes you think maybe you were wrong. Are all people truly good at heart? Are they really doing the best that they can in the time and space that they are given?

I admit being the one doing what may have hurt others. I have. I am human. I am not proud of those moments and choose to learn from those mistakes and the feelings of disappointment in myself. When this happens, I vow to do better next time. I think most people do the same.

Like Maya Angelou say’s “When you know better, you do better.”

I believe this with my whole heart. What baffles me are people to continue to hurt people after they know better or have been hurt themselves. People of authority abusing their power to get what they want knowing full well that it is not benefitting the greater good choose to do it anyway. They choose not to learn lessons offered to them.

The people who choose to point fingers instead of take responsibility are not people I respect or look up to. It is a shame that we often find people like this in positions of authority who often abuse that power. This is the whole premise behind the #MeToo movement and behind all racism in our County. Abuse of power ticks me off.

Since I was a young girl, I have learned to believe that your age, career or title do not give you any special privileges to treat people like crap. I just don’t buy it. I treat the President of a Bank the same way I treat the kid who helps me bag my groceries.

If you are jerk well, I could mirror that right back.. but now I just choose to walk away from conflict. I don’t let my emotions get to me like they used to. I can now stand strong and comfortable in my integrity.

I have come to terms with my ‘shadow side’ the side that won’t let people treat me with disrespect. For this knowledge of learning self-protection came from necessity. The side that helps me set healthy boundaries in my relationships and in life.

These feelings of anger or discomfort have a purpose in our lives and should not be shoved down. We mustn’t be led by these negative emotions but allow them to speak to us and help us discern the truth of our situation.

Being able to listen to our instinctual emotional reflexes to others and situations is a blessing. We are giving these feelings as gifts to help us navigate life. Just because we feel anger, rage or disappointment does not mean our lives are consumed by these emotions. We have the ability to move through our emotions follow our hearts to a brighter tomorrow.

How we choose to navigate our gifts is up to us. When you know better, you do better. I believe this is true for most people. I choose to embrace the light and the dark side of our human duality; we were given these gifts for a reason. How you choose to use them is up to you, and the legacy you wish to leave.

Wishing you an abundance of blessings,

Emy Minzel ~

https://emyminzel.com

@emyminzel

Tag: #dobetter

Self-Reflection lesson

When you know better,