Finding a few small steps towards finding balance ~
Do you ever have a hard time keeping balance in your life? I think most people do at various times. I know some days I do much better than other days but giving and receiving are part of how the world works. It’s an energetic exchange that applies to the natural world and what you give out should be coming back to you. Very similar to how we go to work; then we get a paycheck. Most of us would not go to work every day if we were not getting something of value in return, right?
I’ll give you an example; Stacy and I have decided to dedicate ourselves to a 40-day Nabhi Kriya Kundalini Yoga practice as part of our self-healing journey. It is a spiritual and physical challenge to make our well-being a priority and it also needs to be done every single day, for 40 days. Some days we breeze through easy peasy. Other days we put it off until the last minute. Last Friday I squeaked it in just before midnight!
As part of this Yoga routine, they give you about a 4-minute rest period call Savasana/Corse pose. I have noticed, that when I am super busy with life things, I get a bit antsy when laying there. Thinking. “okay. Is this part over yet? I have things to do.” The routine gives you this time to rest and reflect as it is part of the spiritual teaching and holds a significant purpose; that is why they put it in the practice.
Nabhi Kriya is almost like an aerobic exercise and feels like a workout. I truly enjoy how it makes me feel and the energy it gives me. But I seem to have this urge to deny myself the ‘resting’ part of the practice, when I have really earned it! I literally feel my brain wanting to reject receiving what it is my body/mind/spirit needs, after this physical practice and for what?!
This is not the natural way of the world. To give and to receive in perfect balance is the way it is supposed to work. I am not doing myself any favors by thinking I don’t have the time or deserve the rest my body needs after this workout. I make myself lay and finish the Savasana, clearly, I realize I must train my brain to allow myself to relax.
This is probably why lots of people think they are not ‘good’ at meditating. It’s our overactive minds keeping us from peace. It is our job to control our thoughts and actions. If we train ourselves to exercise every day for 40 days, we sure should be able to meditate or stay in a state of relaxation for 5 minutes a day!
Doing this practice has led to a huge self-realization that I have not been allowing myself to receive the rest/relaxation/good feelings, that I know in my heart, I have ‘earned’ after doing the work! Do you know how this hidden habit I formed, can block my progress in everyday life?! Holy moly kids! This is a breakthrough discovery!
The realization that I do not easily allow myself to receive, has led me to act on that imbalance in all areas of my life. There is a mantra I like to use that serves as a reminder for my brain. “I take in life in perfect balance.” It is a verbal queue to let me allow myself to give and receive what it is I need.
It may even be a bit of human nature to martyr. That is because it is easier to give than receive for some people. When we see people who live like this, it’s easy to see it is not a healthy way to live. You also must work on filling your own cup.
We are not made to give and give until there is nothing left. It’s not the way the universe is supposed to work! There are plenty of us who have this habit and we don’t even see it. Now that my eyes have been opened, I will give you an example of how I made steps to correct it.
Just this weekend we had plans to have Stacy and Marty come over to play cards and have dinner. Stacy and I usually just make appetizers and don’t make a fuss about food for the evenings we gather to do this, just keep things simple. However, this weekend I wanted to make dinner for them because it was Marty’s birthday and I wanted to do something kind for my friends.
When I told Stacy what I was planning she said. “You don’t have to do that!”
I said. “I know! But cooking is how I show love, so please let me!” She obliged and I was thankful for her allowing me to share love with my dear friends.
It turned out that Marty came down with the stomach bug and they could not come for cards and dinner. “Bummer!” but totally understandable. I was thankful they didn’t come and share it! Yet, I had made plans to make cheesecake since it was a special birthday occasion. I found myself thinking, “Well, I don’t need to make this cheesecake, do I?”
Then I thought on it some more… I was denying myself and my husband the desert just because we weren’t having company? This is a silly way to think! We deserve dessert too, don’t you think? (Heck ya!)
So, I made the cheesecake and the dinner we had intended. Guess what?! They were both delicious! There was no need to deny myself after the work of shopping, cooking, cleaning and preparing throughout the day. Which is exactly what I normally would have done, if I had not recognized my own behavior because of this Nahbi Kriya practice!
It is funny how the Universe puts lessons inside of lessons for me. I have enjoyed learning my lessons through Joy and sharing them with others in hopes of helping them too! Here are some other ways I will work on allowing myself to give and receive, in balance, as it should be.
- When I purchase new clothes or shoes; I will promise myself to donate or discard the same number of items from my wardrobe that I no longer like or wear.
- When I am thanked or praised by another I will say ‘thank you’ instead of dismissing the compliment. I will allow myself to receive kindness instead of brushing it off. I will freely give praise and kindness to others as well.
- When I have an abundance of something, I will share it with others. I will allow others to share their abundance with me! This usually happens regularly with friends that garden and is a joyous experience for all involved!
- In a bigger picture kind of way, I am going to make a big effort to donate blood once a month. If I want a good life, wouldn’t it be a cool way to pay it forward by donating blood that gives life?! I like to think so.
- After a work week, I will do better at scheduling time to play and relax on the weekends; doing things that bring me joy. I tend to want to use the weekend time to ‘get things done’ instead of recuperating for the next week to come. I will schedule time and make plans to live, laugh and love! Plus, there is a reason we call Sunday, the day of rest!
There are lots of ways to practice giving and receiving and some of us are better at one than the other. Yet it is still very important to find balance, for all of us, for a healthy mind, body, spirit life!
What are the habits and intentions you use to bring balance into your life? I’d love to hear your suggestions. They may help more people than you know!
Wishing you the magical soulful healing you need right now to be the best you can be.
Emy Minzel ~ Adventure Sister
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Stacy Crep ~ Adventure Sister